


Bent, But Not Broken

by ironlin



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Established Relationship, Fantastic Racism, How Do I Tag, Hurt Keith (Voltron), Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Keith (Voltron) Angst, Keith (Voltron) is a Mess, Keith (Voltron)-centric, Krolia is a good mom, M/M, Nightmares, Poor Keith, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Shiro (Voltron), Torture, Whipping, basically Shiro watches Keith get tortured, because Keith is hurt, it's a sad time, not Keith or Shiro though i promise, not too many details about it but that's not as important, people are mean, pretty major character death in second chapter, sad shiro, the war is lost
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-14
Updated: 2020-11-22
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:08:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 22,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27561280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ironlin/pseuds/ironlin
Summary: “Sweetheart, can you look at me?” he urged softly, letting his hand run through Keith’s long, tangled hair. When Keith obeyed, Shiro smiled grimly despite the unsettling feeling in his chest. There was so much guilt written across Keith’s face, so much terror in those beautiful amethyst eyes.“Sh-Shiro…,” the raven haired pilot whispered, clearly struggling to maintain Shiro’s warm gaze instead of noting their surroundings. “Shiro, we failed. The lions … the team … Allura … all these people…” His voice hitched, and he let himself collapse against Shiro’s familiar chest. “I failed. I failed them. I couldn’t protect any of you…”Or,That last fight with Sendak doesn't end well. Captured with no way to get out, Shiro and Keith must fight to stay alive and keep one another safe despite the awful circumstances. However, when the Galra take a certain liking to Keith, Shiro finds himself struggling to do anything to protect the love of his life.
Relationships: Keith/Shiro (Voltron)
Comments: 16
Kudos: 76





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> hi! welcome to my first story on this site. this is going to be a pretty dark one, so buckle up. there's mentioned sexual assault, pretty graphic torture, and later in the story, there is a mentioned character death. i know, pretty brutal.
> 
> i still hope you guys enjoy!
> 
> love,  
> lin

The minute they were shoved into the dark, damp cell, Shiro scrambled over to Keith, desperate to make sure that he was … somewhat okay. 

Considering their current situation, _okay_ was probably an overstatement. 

“Hey,” he said softly, carefully, as he crouched down beside the young man kneeling on the cold floor, looking so lost. “Keith, you alright?”

Upon cupping his face in a gentle hand, Shiro realized that Keith was shaking ever so slightly. Whether it was from the pain or the fear, he didn’t know. All he did know was that in this moment, he needed to comfort the love of his life, calm him down before panic got the better of him. Most of the people in the other cells — from what Shiro could tell, there were two people per cage — were already going crazy, screaming and yelling and crying. While it definitely wasn’t easy to tune out, Shiro knew that he had to get Keith to do just that. 

“Sweetheart, can you look at me?” he urged softly, letting his hand run through Keith’s long, tangled hair. When Keith obeyed, Shiro smiled grimly despite the unsettling feeling in his chest. There was so much guilt written across Keith’s face, so much terror in those beautiful amethyst eyes. 

“Sh-Shiro…,” the raven haired pilot whispered, clearly struggling to maintain Shiro’s warm gaze instead of noting their surroundings. “Shiro, we failed. The lions … the team … _Allura_ … all these people…” His voice hitched, and he let himself collapse against Shiro’s familiar chest. “ _I_ failed. I failed _them_. I couldn’t protect any of you…”

“No, no, no, Keith, don’t think like that,” Shiro quickly said, wrapping his arms around Keith and pressing soft kisses to his forehead. Despite his own gut wrenching worry, he knew that he needed to stay strong. For Keith. For everyone else. “ _Please_ , don’t think like that. You did everything you could. We all did. But that doesn’t matter now. What matters is that we’re together — which means we _will_ get out of this. I know we will.”

He waited for Keith to nod tiredly before he pulled away so he could look his companion over. There was a pretty nasty cut across his left cheek, among others, and he seemed to be favoring his ribs, one arm wrapped around them protectively. He looked exhausted, but thankfully, there was still that same old spark twinkling in his tight expression. That meant that he hadn’t given up yet; he would keep going for as long as he could. 

That still didn’t erase his pain, however, and it physically hurt Shiro to see him like this. Injured. Vulnerable. “I wish I had something to patch you up with,” he murmured as he brushed his fingers over the bloody gash on his own arm, half hidden by prison rags. 

When they’d been brought onto the ginormous Galran ship that would be their new home as well as the enemy’s, their armor and weapons had been stripped from them. All they had left were some uncomfortable rags that were too hot, but wouldn’t protect them from the cold either. They weren’t flattering, nor were they practical. They were dirty, too — all dusty and ripped. They probably hadn’t been washed in ages… 

Shiro tried his best not to think about that, instead focusing on his Keith. Because Keith always made him feel better, just by _being_. His presence calmed Shiro down and helped him see the bigger picture. Always. 

“They’ll heal,” said man replied, pulling Shiro out of his thoughts. “Are you hurt?”

The question, while not surprising, did take him off guard. Shiro couldn’t help but lean forward and capture Keith in a chaste kiss, hoping to show him just how much he loved him. “A little bruised, but I’m fine,” he answered truthfully, finally moving so he could situate the two of them against a wall. He let Keith curl up into his side, using his prosthetic arm — which was completely dead, a large silver band apparently suppressing its power, although it was still able to move pretty well — to pull him close while the human one ran through his hair again. He just loved the feeling of it, and he knew Keith enjoyed the massage, too. It was a win-win.

“Can you feel Black at all?” he found himself asking. 

His reply was a simple shake of the head, followed by a quiet “no.” Clearly, Keith didn’t want to talk about it, because he changed the subject soon after. “I think Lance and Hunk are about five cells before us,” he explained after a few moments of silence. The other prisoners were still making way too much noise, but the young couple had managed to drown that out in favor of each other’s breathing. “I don’t know where Pidge and her family is.”

“I saw them earlier,” Shiro said, chin resting atop Keith’s head now. “I think they’re further up than us. Hopefully they’re all together.”

“Yeah…” Keith sighed heavily, only to wince at the apparent pain from his battered ribs. He nuzzled further into Shiro, still shivering, anxiety radiating off of him. “I hope the Alteans are okay,” he muttered as he finally let his eyes fall closed. 

“They’re strong,” Shiro assured, and wrapped his arms tighter around Keith, as if to tell him _so are we_. “I’m sure the Blades are already working on getting us out. We just need to hang in there for a while.” He used his index finger to raise Keith’s chin upward, so they would be looking at each other. After a few short moments of contemplation, the younger leaned in to catch Shiro’s mouth in a small, barely there kiss that had the former’s heart bubbling with so much adoration. “I love you,” he breathed out, before Keith even got a chance to say it first. “I love you so much.”

“I love you, too,” Keith echoed, voice raw and full of emotion, There were tears shining in his eyes. “So much.”

“Get some rest, okay? I’ll take the first watch,” Shiro offered, still holding Keith close, almost protectively. Because this was his worst nightmare, and he needed to make sure that as long as Keith was in his arms, they were both safe. His brain needed to believe that; otherwise he wouldn’t be able to stop the fear from consuming him. 

And he couldn’t do that to Keith. 

“Okay. Just … don’t let me sleep for too long. You need it, too.”

Letting out a wry chuckle, Shiro nodded and helped Keith get more comfortable by pillowing the younger’s head in his lap. He was so grateful that Keith didn’t protest, that he agreed to get the rest he deserved without putting up a fight like he normally would. It just went to show how exhausted he really was. 

“I won’t, baby, I promise.”

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

Keith didn’t get to sleep for long. Within less than an hour, two Galran soldiers barged into their cell. 

By now, both Shiro and Keith were freezing, trembling in each other’s arms, struggling to stay warm. Just like Shiro had predicted, their clothes did nothing to protect them from the cold air surrounding them, coming through the metal vents in the ceiling. The only thing he could think to do to preserve body heat was curl around Keith’s smaller body and press him close. 

When the guards came, Keith immediately stirred, gasping once he saw their visitors. 

“Well, well, well, if it isn’t the former Black Paladin and his halfbreed whore,” one of the Galra, a tall, burly looking creature, said coldly, an ugly smirk on his face.

Even though Keith tensed at the insult, Shiro forced himself not to say anything. He simply settled on an angry glare instead. 

“What, you’re not gonna say anything to defend his honor?” the other asked. He was thinner, less bulky, but he had more weapons on him than his friend, one clawed hand resting on the pistol on his belt. The bastard was purposely trying to provoke his prisoners — he _wanted_ them to cower in fear. 

Too bad he didn’t know who he was dealing with, if Keith and Shiro’s almost murderous expressions were anything to go by. 

However the bigger Galra didn’t look phased. His own hideous smile only grew bigger as he craned his neck to look behind him and yelled, “You hear that, _humans_? Your precious leader has Galra blood! He’s been deceiving you this entire time! What do you all have to say to that?”

Shiro’s blood ran cold when shouting began to echo through the halls, and he unconsciously pulled Keith tighter to his chest. This was exactly why they’d chosen to hide Keith’s heritage from most of the Garrison. They only told a select number of people because they understood that not everyone would react well, and the last thing any of them wanted was to put Keith into even more danger. 

The fact that this was being used against him _now_ was bad. Really bad. 

“You fucker, your people killed my family!” one man screamed, causing Keith to wince and hang his head, his breath shaky and wet. 

“I trusted you! I hope you _rot_ in this fucking place.”

“You’re the reason we all got captured! You’re the reason we’re gonna die!”

“Traitor!”

“Aw, you hear that?” Bulky cooed, chuckling lowly. “Now that they know who you are, they hate you. They _blame_ you. And they’re right.”

“No, they’re _not_ ,” Shiro quickly said. Then, pressing his lips to Keith’s ear and lowering his voice, “They’re not, sweetheart. You didn’t do anything wrong, I swear.”

“You really believe that? You sure he’s not just playing you? How do you know he won’t betray you? He’s the enemy isn’t he? He’s nothing but a _traitor_.” 

Once again, Shiro glared at Skinny, knowing that if he chose to speak, it wouldn’t end well. He just carded his fingers through Keith’s long locks while the other shook against him, now from guilt and not just the cold. It was heartbreaking to see him like this.

“I may be mistaken, Alkon,” Bulky began, “but don’t we usually punish traitors like him?”

“No, you’re right, Throk, we do,” Alkon - what an ugly name - agreed. The corners of his mouth pulled up into a snarl, and he took a step forward. “We do.”

And then he and Throk were ripping Keith out of Shiro's arms.

“Keith!” Shiro cried as the younger was dragged towards the exit, kicking and protesting and _fighting_. All it resulted in was a strong kick to Keith’s already hurt ribs, and Shiro flinched at the soft moan that escaped his boyfriend’s lips. 

“Shir-ro…!” 

“Keith, hold on, okay? I’ll be right here when you get back! I love you!”

Before he realized that he should try to follow them, the door to their cage was locked shut, leaving Shiro all alone. His heart raced as he watched Keith being led down the hallways, the younger’s chin pressed to his chest and body shaking. Most of the other prisoners were banging against the bars separating them from Keith, screaming obscenities at him that he just didn’t deserve. Vaguely, Shiro was able to hear what sounded like Lance telling him to stay strong. Another voice that awfully reminded Shiro of Hunk said that they loved him. 

It seemed to take forever for all the shouting to finally die down. When it did, Shiro couldn’t help but feel anger washing over him, and he found himself scolding the people that dared to hurt Keith like this. “He did so much for you,” he growled out. “He tried so hard to save all of you. _This_ is how you repay him?”

Nobody seemed to have a reply for him. 

With a heavy sigh, Shiro sat back down against the wall from earlier and wrapped his arms around his knees, tears streaming down his dirtied cheeks. He wasn’t able to protect Keith, he kept thinking. The Galra would hurt him. They would try to break his beautiful, kind, brave Keith just like they’d broken Shiro at the very beginning of this never ending nightmare. 

He’d never wanted that. He’d never wanted Keith to suffer like he had. Yet that was exactly what was happening to him. All because of him.

The hours that consisted of Shiro blaming himself and praying for Keith passed so slowly. Shiro didn’t let himself close his eyes for a second — he didn’t want to be asleep when Keith was brought back in. 

By the time he was finally — _finally_ — thrown back into the cage, Shiro was barely awake. However, he still forced himself to scramble over to the younger’s side, calling for him, asking him to open those big amethyst eyes of his.

“Hey, hey, baby, you’re okay,” he murmured hurriedly as he gathered Keith close. His eyes searched for wounds. Colorful curses flew around their cage at what they found. 

Poor Keith was shirtless, soaked to the bone, _bloodied_. His stomach was a canvas of black and blue and yellow bruises. His face was littered with dozens of claw marks, all of them bleeding sluggishly. His skin was icy to the touch, cold water dripping from his hair and fingers. At first he’d thrashed in Shiro’s arms, clearly scared, but after realizing that he was safe he slumped forward, panting heavily. 

“There you are,” the older man said in a soft, hopefully soothing tone. “You’re okay. Everything’s okay.”

“Shiro,” Keith ground out, eyes scrunched shut. Coughs wracked his small frame, no doubt extremely painful and dizzying. “Sh-Shiro … h-hurts…”

“I know, sweetheart, I know,” Shiro said with a small, sad smile. “Just - just try to breathe, baby. I’m right here with you, you’re okay.”

“T-They said they’d be … back s-soon, Shiro,” Keith whispered tiredly. He could barely speak, his words slurred and uneven. “They w-want you … next. I c-can’t let them t-take you. I c-c-can’t-”

“Hey, no, don’t worry about that right now, Keith. Everything’s going to be perfectly fine, I promise you.” Shiro took a moment to press their lips together, hoping to pour in as much as he could in such a small gesture. “God, I’m so sorry this is happening to you. I can’t stand to see you like this.” 

All around them, the people were divided. Some had listened to what Shiro said earlier, thankfully, while others still didn’t get it. Those were the ones that laughed at Keith’s pain, that continued to taunt and insult him. That watched him as he writhed in Shiro’s arms and reveled in it. Shiro had no idea if Keith was hearing or seeing any of it. Hopefully not. 

“No. I-I’m sorry … Shiro. I’m so s-sorry,” 

That was what ultimately shattered Shiro’s heart into a million pieces.

Burying his face in the crook of his companion’s neck, Shiro gathered Keith into a loose hug, a little shocked when the latter hugged him back, arms shaking with fatigue. “You have absolutely _nothing_ to be sorry for, Keith,” he assured him. “Nothing.”

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

“How are you doing, baby?”

“Hmm…”

“Not so good, huh?”

“... just-t tired,” Keith said quietly, curling up into an even tighter ball and grunting softly. 

Shiro nodded as a heavy tremor traveled up his spine, index finger drawing random patterns on his partner’s back. He’d long since given Keith his shirt with the hope of helping him warm up as soon as possible. The last thing they needed was for him to get sick. He wished he could do more — he wished they were back at home, cuddling in their room, laughing and kissing, all tangled up in the sheets of their comfortable bed...

God, if only he could just go back in time and prevent all this.

“I know,” he murmured with a gentle kiss to Keith’s cheek. The younger had his head pillowed on his legs again, abused body still trembling violently. The tremors seemed to have gotten much, much worse. Shiro did everything he could to bring Keith some kind of comfort, whether it was through small kisses, or quiet assurances, or hugs, or anything else he could think of. He prayed that it was enough. He hadn’t asked what Throk and Alkon had done to him earlier, and Keith hadn’t offered up any information about it. Shiro knew that it was best to let him open up, not make him feel forced to provide an explanation. Honestly, he was kind of glad for it. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to find out what Keith went through. 

Those damned Galrans refused to give them any kind of medical supplies. Clearly, they wanted Keith to suffer. It made Shiro want to punch his way through this prison and kill the ones that dared to hurt the love of his life like this. Slowly. 

At least they’d been given some food and water, the rational part of his mind supplied for him. While the packets of food goo tasted like ash, and there wasn’t enough to actually fill their stomachs, it was something. And even though the water clearly wasn’t filtered, it was one of the things that would keep them alive in the long run, so Shiro was more than grateful to have it. 

“I-I wonder how the … others a-are doing.”

Keith’s weak, spent voice pulled Shiro out of his thoughts, reminding him of what he should _actually_ be thinking about. 

“Probably worrying about us,” he replied teasingly, hoping to lighten up the mood. A smile blossomed at the corners of his mouth when Keith reached up to whack his arm. There was no strength behind the attack, just exhaustion and love. It sent pangs of guilt up Shiro’s spine. Just the reminder of how hurt Keith really was was enough to sober up and reach for Keith’s small, slender hand. “Hey, I’m sure they’re all doing okay,” he said as he interlocked their fingers together. “Don’t worry, alright? Just focus on resting.”

At that, Keith let out a dry chuckle, only to wince in pain. “E-Easier said than … done,” he said breathlessly, and attempted to squeeze Shiro’s hand out of pure desperation. Shiro didn’t mind. He would do anything to help. The younger was already suffering from pretty harsh nightmares. Sleep didn’t come easy for him, and the conditions of their god awful cell certainly weren’t doing either of them any favors. 

So if Keith took to squeezing the life out of Shiro’s limbs as a way of fighting the agony, so be it.

“You’re doing great, sweetheart. You know that right?” he praised. “I’m so proud of you.”

“For w-what?” Keith gritted out through chattering teeth, shoulders suddenly extremely tense and a brand new furrow forming on his brow. “I got u-us all caught … I’m comp-pletely useless. And I w-won’t be able to … protect you if t-they come for you. There’s … nothing t-to be proud o-of.”

“Keith, don’t think like that,” Shiro scolded lightly, leaning forward to press his lips against Keith’s temple, lingering there. “None of that is true. Please, don’t do that to yourself.”

For a few, neverending moments, Keith was completely silent, head hung and eyes closed. “S-Sorry,” he finally whispered, a few stray tears slowly making their way down his face. “I know, S-Shiro. You’re right.”

Shiro rushed to wipe the tears away; he hated seeing Keith cry. “Just … try to sleep some more, okay? You need to save your energy.”

“Okay…,” Keith said after some more silence. “L-Love you.”

“I love you, too, baby. I’ll be right here with you when you wake up.”

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

Shiro jerked awake when the door was slammed open, immediately waking up and cursing himself for falling asleep in the first place.

“Keith,” he said softly but urgently, and gently shook the other’s shoulder. The groan that escaped Keith’s lips was so hard to hear. “Keith, wake up. Please”

While Keith returned from his restless slumber, Shiro looked up at their visitors, cursing at the sight of Throk and Alkon standing in front of them. Instinctively, his arms tightened around Keith. “You’re not getting to him,” he growled. If only his voice didn’t shake from the cold — he would have sounded much more menacing that way.

“You have nothing to worry about, Champion,” Alkon said in reply. “We’re gonna get to _both_ of you today.”

_Oh shit._

The minute the realization set in, Shiro began to struggle, attempting to kick the Galrans away before they got to him and Keith. “No! Don’t you dare! Get the fuck away from him. Don’t touch me, dammit.”

But every single one of his threats, pleas, or protests weren’t paid any attention to. Shiro cried out when Keith was pulled out of his arms _again_ , the poor thing barely aware and way too hurt to fight back. Even despite his own fatigue, Shiro tried so hard to get free, to take his captors down. 

It was all for nothing. 

A heavy punch to the face was what finally slowed him down. It left him dazed and dizzy, and it was just enough to knock him out until they arrived at a new, windowless room, one that was full of puddles of water and blood. It sent shivers coursing through Shiro’s entire body. _Could some of that blood be Keith’s?_

He immediately rushed to his boyfriend when they were shoved inside. The young man was already curled up in a tight ball, breathing heavily. He looked … so small, Shiro realized. There was so much discomfort written across his pale, yet beautiful, features. Still, he opened his eyes to find Shiro, so much relief flooding his eyes upon locating him. “Shiro. A-Are you alright?”

Shiro was quick to gather him in a gentle hug, kissing the top of his head and running his fingers through the other’s hair. “I’m fine, Keith. Promise.”

A tiny smile graced Keith’s chapped lips. “G-Good.”

“Well, well, well,” Throk’s familiar, hated voice echoed through the room. He sounded excited, which didn’t mean anything good. “Look how cute. Our favorite prisoners, comforting each other. Too bad it won’t make a difference.” He laughed, then addressed Shiro. “Your little whore made it quite difficult for us last time. I wonder if he’ll think twice with you here.”

“You’re sick,” Shiro snarled. “What do you think you’ll gain from all this?”

“Oh, the slut didn’t tell you? Sendak wants the lions. And unless your paladins agree to lower their barriers, we’ll continue to hurt them until they break.”

Shiro felt his jaw drop. Of course the Galra would have a motive for hurting them. Of course they wanted something now that they had them in their clutches. The lions. They were the most valuable, the most important pieces of the puzzle. Shiro should have figured that out by now. He should have been smarter, dammit.

“D-Don’t touch any of them,” Keith managed to say, fury evident behind all that exhaustion. “Don’t y-you dare.”

God, why did he have to do that? Why was he still trying to protect the others at the risk of his own life? What would Shiro do if he lost him?

“You really think that your empty threats are going to do anything?” Throk asked in wonder, a predatory gleam in his dark eyes. “Hopefully we’ll beat that right out of you today. Alkon! I think they’re ready.”

The door to the room opened with a hiss, and Alkon came walking in, a rather large box in his hands. There was a bright, excited smile on his lips that was anything but friendly. “Hm … What weapon am I going to use today? I wonder…” 

An unrecognizable growl escaped Shiro, the anger coursing through him like a fever. “If you touch even a hair on his head, I swear to God, I’ll-”

“You’ll what?” Throk said as he advanced towards his prisoners. “You have nothing. If you even try to make a move, we’ll kill you both right here on the spot. In reality, Sendak doesn’t need _you_ , just the Lions. He could figure out how to get to them with or without your help. He’s just letting us have some fun.”

Despite his best efforts, Shiro couldn’t prevent Throk from grabbing Keith and throwing him towards Alkon. The skinner Galran was rummaging through his chest of torture devices, sorting through them. Trying to figure out which one would cause Keith more pain. When he noticed that Keith was trying to get up, he kicked him, hard. It knocked all the air out of the raven haired pilot, and gave Alkon just enough time to take out a whip and rip Keith’s shirt in two. 

Keith gasped at the cold air that hit his bare back and tried to curl into himself. Alkon’s boot on his spine stopped him, preventing him from doing anything other than lay there on his stomach. He tensed visibly when Shiro screamed his name. “I-I’m okay, Shiro,” he said. “I’ll be f-fine.” A weak smile graced the corners of his mouth, completely betrayed by the fear radiating off of him. “P-Promise.”

However, Shiro could tell that _no_ , Keith wasn’t okay. Whips weren’t a fond memory for Keith — all those years spent in the foster system had caused more than enough trauma for him. Early on in his relationship with Shiro, Keith had revealed that he’d had a foster father that regularly beat him, using a belt, or a metal wire, or anything else he could find. As a result, if Keith ever heard the unbuckling of a belt, he panicked. And it always took a while to calm him down.

This was going to be ten times worse and Shiro knew it.

And he was so lost in his own thoughts, so worried about Keith’s reaction, that he barely realized that Alkon had begun. 

Shiro jerked at the first touch of the whip, brokenly whispering his companion’s name while the other’s breath hitched. 

“Trying to hide your pain again, halfbreed?” Throk mocked from behind Shiro — when had he started holding him down in the first place? “You should know by now that there’s no use. Yet you still resist.” He laughed, the sound harsh and cruel. “Alkon, give it your worst for me, will you?”

“It’ll be my pleasure,” Alkon replied, and then slammed his whip down upon Keith’s back once more, smile widening.

This time, Keith couldn’t help but moan softly, eyes clenched shut, hands twitching while his body jerked repeatedly. He already seemed more pale than ever before, and he was refusing to look at Shiro. Silent tears streamed down his cheeks and onto the cold floor.

“Crying already? That’s a start.”

“Stop it,” Shiro gritted out. His ears were ringing. His heart _ached_. “Stop hurting him.”

“Not until he screams, Champion,” Throk muttered. “I want him to know his place.”

A choked sob escaped Keith. The whip had curled around his shoulder upon its descent, causing blood to splash onto his face. His gaze found Shiro’s, eyes desperate and wide. It was becoming too much for him. This was only the fifth hit and the memories and the pain and the shock was already suffocating him. He wouldn’t be able to handle more. 

And yet he didn’t have a choice. And Shiro had no way of stopping this. 

The only thing he could do is talk to him and pray that it was enough to help. 

“Keith, baby, just focus on breathing,” he said softly, completely ignoring Throk, whose sharp claws were digging into his collarbone. He could feel the blood that was traveling down his chest. “Just breathe and listen to me, okay? Focus on me, sweetheart. You’re doing great.”

Another hit. 

Another heart wrenching cry of agony. 

And another. 

One more. 

Out of pure rage, Shiro started to struggle. Curses flew past his lips, pointed directly at the bastard keeping him away from Keith. The younger was barely awake now, almost dissociating from reality, whimpering at every sickening _crack_. 

“Enough!” Shiro roared. “He can’t take much more of this!”

“I’ll decide when enough is enough,” Alkon said with a chuckle. The sound made Keith flinch violently. 

“Just take me, dammit! Hurt _me_.”

Keith’s resolve seemed to completely shatter at that. “Takash-shi, n-no…,” he whispered brokenly, only to gasp from yet another hit. A soft keen escaped through his clenched lips. “P-Please, don’t … I’m o-okay.”

Shiro knew that Keith rarely called him by his first name. It told him that even in this situation, the only thing Keith wanted to do was protect him. Which only made Shiro feel so much worse. 

While the two of them were busy staring at each other, silently communicating like they always did, Throk cackled loudly. Clearly, he was enjoying this. “I know you would probably _love_ to be in his place right now,” he explained, words slow and deliberate and unforgiving. He was still latched on to Shiro, refusing to let go, and the former was starting to worry about the joint popping out of its socket. “... but the slut is _so_ fun to play with, don’t you think, Alkon?”

“Certainly,” was his friend’s simple, cold reply. 

Almost as if preparing himself, Keith hung his head and sighed heavily. The tears were still coming in full force. Shiro wished he could just gather him in a tight embrace, hold him close, and wipe all of his pain away.

The torture continued. 

By the time the thirtieth lash came, Keith could barely take in air anymore. His body trembled like a leaf, sweat and blood was dripping off his skin in rivets. He let out a wrecked scream, one that echoed off the walls and shook the ground. Shiro was barely holding it together now, and yet still refusing to look away from Keith’s limp body. 

He couldn’t. 

“Now we’re getting somewhere!” Throk exclaimed happily. 

He’d finally got what he wanted. Keith screamed. 

When the number became forty, Keith’s back was nothing more than a criss cross of bright red lines. As he lay there on the floor, his body was in spasm, clearly shocked. His usually bright purple orbs were glassy and dull, staring at nothing in particular, probably a nonexistent speck on the wall. 

He wasn’t responding to any of Shiro’s calls anymore. 

“I think I’ve had my fun for today,” Alkon finally said, trailing the tip of his whip over Keith’s mottled skin, making the other tremble. The bastard was drenched in sweat. He kneeled down to wipe some of it off on Keith’s arm, grinning at the flinch he received in return. “Let’s take these two back to their cell. Give them some time to … lick their wounds.”

Everything was an utter blur as Shiro was led back to that now heavenly-sounding prison. His heart was racing at the thought of finally being able to tend to Keith. If only time could move faster, he thought. Thankfully, he was the one to be thrown into inside the cell first, which gave him the perfect opportunity to catch his poor companion before he hit the ground and aggravated his wounds. Even with warm, strong arms to catch him, Keith still moaned quietly, desperately clinging to Shiro like a lifeline. 

“Shiro…”

“I’m here, Keith, I’m right here,” the older assured him, and pressed chaste kisses to the top of Keith’s head as he situated themselves against the closest wall. “You’re okay. _You’re okay_.”

The next few minutes consisted of Shiro murmuring nothingness, mostly for himself at this point and not for Keith. He didn’t know what else to do.

Because having seen everything that the other went through in the past hour, he needed to convince himself that his best friend, the person he loved most, really was, in fact, _okay_. 

Besides, it wasn’t like he _actually_ had anything else to make everything better. 

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

Days seemed to pass. 

At this point, Shiro had no idea what time was anymore. All he could focus on was keeping Keith as comfortable as possible, not some useless seconds that ticked by so, so slowly with no end in sight. 

The Galrans hadn’t given them anything to treat Keith with yet. Shiro still had a small amount of hope left that they would. 

Thankfully, the lashes on Keith’s back hadn’t gotten infected, but there was a chance regardless. It also didn’t make them any less painful. The young man mostly slept, albeit poorly. The nightmares that plagued him were brutal, unforgiving. Everytime he woke up, he panicked, barely lucid enough to figure out that Shiro was there, that he was more or less safe. 

It left him terrified, hurting, and longing for home. 

Currently, he was stuck in yet another bad dream, thrashing in Shiro’s arms and whimpering weakly. The older man was begging him to wake, stroking his dark locks and holding him close. “Come back to me, sweetheart,” he murmured lovingly, tears in his eyes. “Just open those pretty eyes for me.”

“N-No…” Keith whispered, voice broken, scared. “D-Don’t … touch him. Leav-ve him a-alone.”

Immediately, Shiro knew exactly who the _him_ in Keith’s nightmare was. Lips brushing over his temple gently, he continued talking to him. “Keith, baby, I’m okay, I’m safe. Please, wake up. Come back to me.”

Minutes later, Keith jerked back into reality with a soft cry of fear. His pupils were blown wide, his body shaking. Upon realizing where he was and that Shiro was behind him, he visibly relaxed and shook his head, almost as if to clear it. He was watching him with disbelief written across his face, but it quickly dissolved into relief when Shiro pressed their lips together in a comforting kiss. 

“Hey,” the older said softly. “There you are.”

“H-Hi,” Keith replied in a small, tired voice. “I had another o-one … didn’t-t I?”

“Yeah, you did.” Carefully, Shiro cupped his companion’s face with his human hand, tender fingers running over the dark circles underneath the poor thing’s eyes. He could see the blatant terror written across Keith’s pale features; clearly, he was too weak to even hide it anymore “Do you want to talk about it? You know I’m here if you need me.”

With a deep, raspy deep breath in, Keith nodded. “The G-Galra killed … e-everyone. You w-were the last one … left, a-and I still … couldn’t s-sav-ve you. You all … d-died because of m-m-me.” 

“Oh, sweetheart,” Shiro murmured, right as Keith sat up and nuzzled his face into the crook of his neck. The older didn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around Keith’s smaller body and curl around him. “We didn’t die, and none of it was your fault. You know that, right, Keith?”

“I-I know, Shiro. It … It just f-felt so real.” By now, Keith’s words were slurred and uneven. He sounded completely spent, the lack of sleep and the pain from his injuries leaving him so exhausted.

He was too young for all of this, Shiro thought sadly, and pressed a hasty kiss to Keith’s temple. God, he didn’t deserve any of this. And yet the world was still punishing him. For what? “I-”

The sound of the cell door opening cut Shiro off, made him gasp in shock and anticipation. Keith wouldn’t be able to handle another torture session, and they both knew it. He couldn’t let the Galra take him away again. For a third _fucking_ time. 

However, it wasn’t Alkon or Throk that came inside. It was a sentry, one that was carrying a wooden bucket and a tiny box of some sort. Shiro’s eyes widened when he realized that this might have been what Keith needed so badly now. The Galran simply dropped the “cargo” on the ground, snarled at the two prisoners, and then left as quickly as he came, without even saying a word. 

A few seconds passed before Shiro broke through his surprise. He quickly helped Keith off of him before he got up on shaky legs and dashed over to what he assumed were supplies. He was right. “Keith, they gave us water!” he exclaimed in pure relief. “And washcloths!”

“O-Oh…,” Keith said sleepily, and allowed Shiro to turn him around so the other could take a look at his back better. 

“This is going to hurt, Keith, I’m sorry,” Shiro explained as he dipped a cloth in the pail, which was filled with water. It was cold, almost on the verge of freezing, but it would hopefully sooth Keith’s burning skin and prevent any infection from setting it. 

“I-I know,” the younger replied, still shivering. Everything about him radiated apprehension, and yet so much trust all at the same time. “‘S okay.”

Sighing heavily, Shiro began to clean Keith’s wounds, trying to be as careful and gentle as possible. He took his time washing away the blood and grime marring his usually clean body. He whispered soft assurances into Keith’s ear — similar to how he did during his most recent nightmare — whenever he was overcome by the agony, he pressed tender kisses to his hair, or squeezed his small hand instead. It still didn’t make doing this any easier. 

Keith made a clear effort to keep quiet, to hide his pain. Shiro knew that it was all because of his difficult past. It was because of horrible, unforgiving people that chose to take advantage of a kind, but scared, little boy that literally had nowhere else to go all those years ago. Those were the people that didn’t care that Keith was actually such an incredible child in need of something as simple as love, that needed just a little bit of kindness, that would have loved back twice as hard if given the chance. Instead, all Keith got were beatings, verbal abuse, and neglect. Nothing someone of his age should have ever gone through. Ever. 

At times like these, Shiro wished he had found his boyfriend earlier. Maybe he could have made a difference.

For now though, this would have to be enough.

After finishing up with Keith, the grey haired man took a quick moment to wipe himself down — it’s been too long since he actually felt a little like himself again — before he set the bucket aside and gathered Keith into his arms once more. “All done,” he said, waiting for him to get a little more comfortable even despite their situation. “You did so good, Keith.”

“Thanks, S-Shiro,” the other breathed out, a weak smile blossoming on his chapped lips. 

“You’re welcome, baby. I just wish I could do more.”

“N-No.” Shaking his head jerkily, Keith looked up and leaned in, managing to kiss the corner of Shiro’s mouth, a gesture that left tears in both their eyes. “Y-You’re doing … so much.” He paused for a second, contemplating. Then, shyly asked, “C-Could you just-t … do one m-more thing … for m-me?” 

Shiro felt his heart begin to bubble with adoration. _God, what did I do to deserve such an angel?_ he thought. _How will I ever repay him for being so incredible_ ? “Anything,” he replied. Because he really would do absolutely _anything_ for him, no matter what. 

“Could you … s-sing me a s-song?”

At first, Shiro thought he misheard. “A song?” he repeated, to which Keith nodded. He certainly hadn’t expected such a simple request. But somehow, it made perfect sense. And that made Shiro want to do it even more. “Of course, sweetheart. Of course I will.”

It took him exactly five seconds to come up with a melody, one that he knew Keith would enjoy. Taking a deep breath in, Shiro started to sing: 

  


_Talk to me softly_

_There’s something in your eyes_

_Don’t hang your head in sorrow_

_And please don’t cry_

_I know how you feel inside, I’ve_

_I’ve been there before_

_Somethin’ is changin’ inside you_

_And don’t you know_

  


_Don’t you cry tonight_

_I still love you baby_

_Don’t you cry tonight_

_Don’t you cry tonight_

_There’s a heaven above you baby_

_And don’t you cry tonight…_

  


When he finished, Shiro found himself crying quietly, and so was Keith. The emotions had overwhelmed them, memories of their past surfacing to the forefronts of their minds and reminding them of happier times. Of their life before everything happened, before everything fell apart. 

After all, this was _their_ song. It was what Shiro always used to make Keith feel better, after a particularly bad day or a night terror. It was their favorite song, despite how outdated it was. Something about it made it perfect for them. Simple, yet full of so much meaning all at the same time. 

A tired, lifeless laugh left Keith, along with a few badly disguised sniffles. “I th-thought the whole point w-was … _not_ to cry,” he joked, which earned him a gentle but passionate kiss that he gladly melted into.

Even despite his fear and their awful conditions, Shiro burst into almost hysterical laughter, kissing Keith repeatedly, the tears still streaming down. “I guess we’re just a bunch of old saps, aren’t we?”

Keith simply grinned, eyes wide and glowing with just a brief spark of happiness. A good look on him, Shiro decided. One that he wanted to see again in the near future. 

Unconsciously, Shiro took to running his fingers through Keith’s growing dark hair, unknotting the knots and marveling at the other’s mesmerizing features. “You’re so beautiful, Keith,” he voiced aloud, and smirked at the surprised expression that appeared on Keith’s face. 

It quickly turned to shame. 

“Even like this?” he suddenly whispered. 

There was just so much self-doubt in his dark gaze that shouldn’t have ever been there. 

“Even like this.” Shiro responded immediately. How Keith didn’t see what he saw in him was puzzling, but understandable nonetheless. Thinking about it some more, Shiro silently vowed to prove to Keith that he was worthy of love, of _being_ loved and adored by him and so many others. It would just take some time. “Always.” 

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

If Shiro was correct — and he hoped to whoever was still up there, watching, that he wasn’t — then he and Keith have spent about a month in captivity.

Miraculously, no Galra soldiers came for Keith again. In fact, nobody was coming into their cell at all, except for the sentries that provided them with food and water. It was rare though, and from what Shiro could figure out, they were given these necessities every five days. 

There was never enough to actually fill them up, either. 

Shiro was very aware that neither he nor his companion would not be able to survive much longer with so little sustenance, barely any rest, and frigid air that seeped into their bones and left them shivering. 

By now, Shiro could practically see Keith’s bones poking out from underneath his skin, mocking him, making it clear that he hadn’t done enough to protect the love of his life. Keith was hanging on by a thread, always curled up in Shiro’s lap with his eyes closed, sometimes sleeping, sometimes fighting off the nightmares — that seemed to be getting worse by the day — or sometimes listening to Shiro, who always tried to help by singing more songs, or telling stories. He barely smiled anymore, and even when he tried, it was weak, there only to assure Shiro that he was still there, that he was still alive. 

Needless to say, they never separated from one another. They couldn’t. Not when they were keeping each other sane. Being able to actually _touch_ Keith was Shiro’s saving grace. He had no idea what he would’ve done if he didn’t have that. He probably would have smashed his head through a wall by now. 

The lashes mottling his back were pretty much healed. Only one had gotten infected, the one that curled around his shoulder, the deepest mark, but thankfully the Galrans had responded quickly and gave them some kind of healing patches. They somehow _erased_ the infection, the only reminder of it being the thick scar, similar to the one Keith got during his Trials, and the remnants of a small fever. 

It was such a relief. At least they’d been shown some mercy, Shiro constantly thought, so grateful for such a small but powerful favor. After all, Keith could have very well _died_ from that. 

For him, it was way too difficult to imagine a life without his other half, let alone _live_ it. 

The older knew that he wasn’t doing all that great himself. He had grown thinner, more gaunt-looking. His body was weak. He was barely able to stand up anymore. Sometimes, Shiro would catch Keith watching him, studying him with a sad glimmer in his amethyst eyes. His expression was always full of guilt, which was kind of ironic considering Shiro probably wore something similar. 

Each time he woke up, Keith would greet Shiro. Sometimes, he found the strength to sit up and kiss him, and Shiro relished in those moments. It helped him think of simpler times, and it helped him imagine a possible future where they could kiss all day long, without anything to hold them back. He prayed for that future. He hoped that it would come sooner rather than later. 

At the moment, he had Keith sitting up against his chest, mechanical hand drawing soothing patterns on the other’s forearm while they existed in silence. They both were too exhausted to speak. In moments like these, it was too hard to talk one another through the pain or stress or anxiety. Just … knowing that they were both more or less alive was enough. At least for now.

“I-I can’t believe I’m … s-saying this, but I-I think … I a-actually m-miss L-Lance’s … jokes.”

It wasn’t until Keith finally broke that silence that Shiro returned back to reality. He managed a small smile as the words sunk in, chuckling softly, even despite the way Keith’s voice rasped and trembled. “Me, too,” he agreed jokingly. “I miss seeing your face all red and embarrassed while you’re trying to make a comeback.”

“Hey…,” Keith exclaimed weakly, though there was a small smirk at the corner of his lips. “I th-thought you were o-on … my side, Sh-Shirogane.”

“Of course I am,” Shiro assured, with a quick peck to Keith’s temple. “But it was pretty funny.”

At that, Keith let out what would have been the equivalent of his normal, scary growl, but it was quiet, strained, nothing like what it actually was supposed to be. It was heartbreaking. “Haha … s-so funny.”

“You know you love me.”

Keith’s tiny smirk blossomed into a full on smile, one that warmed Shiro down to the core and made him forget, just for a second, that they were in a cell, unsure of if they would ever escape or be rescued, so far away from a soft, comfortable bed they could lie in for hours and hours and hours. Shiro missed that _so much_. This one little instant let him let go and revel in a dream he desperately wanted to be real.

“Hm…” Keith seemed to be thinking the same thing, too, because his eyes were glazed over, shining brightly, his mind clearly lost in this … paradise. “I do,” he whispered. “I l-love y-you so much.”

Right when he said it, their cell opened with a harsh _bang_ , causing the two of them to gasp, gazes whipping to the door. Immediately, Shiro felt his entire body go rigid upon seeing who their new visitor was. His arms tightened around his boyfriend’s slim form in a pathetic attempt to keep him safe. 

“Sendak,” he hissed. The name had Keith tensing, muscles coiled up like a snake, his brain clearly in a state of panic already. 

This wasn’t good.

The ginormous Galra in question towered over them with an excited expression across his face. His mechanical arm was crackling ever so slightly, meant to instill fear. Behind him were Alkon and Throk, but neither of them were carrying themselves with their usual confidence. Throk was covered in bloody scratches and holes, seemingly from a blaster of sorts. His gaze was downcast, subdued. Alkon, on the other hand, was staring straight ahead, not at anything in particular. He was missing his left hand. And it didn’t look like he had wanted to lose the extremity, if the haphazard bandages were anything to go by.

That only meant one thing, Shiro realized. Those two soldiers, the ones that had tortured Keith and left him in shambles, hadn’t been given the all-clear to do that. They’d gone against direct orders. They’d paid the price for it. 

Most likely, it had been Sendak who’d shown them the consequences of their actions. 

“I must apologize, Champion, for my men,” he said while Shiro was still reeling from his brand new revelation, “they weren’t supposed to mistreat your … lover like they had. I made sure to show them what happened when they did something without my permission. It’s a shame, really. I had plans for the halfbreed. Big plans. These two idiots took that away from me.”

With a snarl of fury, Shiro shook his head and squeezed Keith, who was shaking with anticipation. His eyes were wide, mouth parted ever so slightly. “You’re not laying your dirty hands on him, Sendak. You wouldn’t dare.”

“Actually, Champion,” Sendak gritted out, “I think I would. And you’re not going to be able to do _anything_ to stop me.”

Slowly, Shiro forced himself to stand up, making sure he was guarding Keith as he took a battle stance. He wasn’t about to let Keith go without a fight. He wasn’t about to let Sendak harm him. Not like how he’d hurt _him_ so long ago. 

He should have known that he was way too malnourished to do anything of the sort.

All his determination accomplished was a knee to the stomach that sent him to the ground, followed by a kick that threw him against a wall with a sickening crunch. 

“ _Shiro!_ ” he heard Keith scream. 

A soft cry of pain echoed through the room, one that caused Shiro to shiver and force his tired eyes open. He saw Keith, pinned by Sendak, limply struggling against the hand tightly curled around his neck, holding him in place by way of suffocation. There were tears in his eyes. 

Suddenly, Shiro found someone holding him, keeping him away from Keith just like they had when the younger had been whipped. He couldn’t help but roar, both in anguish and frustration, trying so hard to free himself, but to no avail. Shivers traveled up his spine as he watched Sendak caress Keith’s face with a long finger, watched as Keith gasped and began to squirm. This kind of touch, the kind that came from a person Keith didn’t trust, that didn’t come from _Shiro_ , was always unwelcomed, and brought far too many bad memories with it.

“Hm, he’s so … pretty,” Sendak cooed, running his hands all over Keith’s battered body in a way that made the poor thing whimper. “I have a feeling I’ll enjoy this.”

“No! Don’t touch him!” Shiro cried. The anger in his tone was completely gone, replaced by desperation. He began to beg. “Don’t, Sendak, please. Leave him alone.”

But no matter what he tried to say, Sendak wasn’t budging. With one last smirk directed at Shiro, the bastard grabbed Keith by the arm and began pulling him out of the cell, slapping him whenever the other’s protests got too loud. At some point, whoever was holding Shiro finally let him go, leaving quickly enough for him not to be able to retaliate in any way. 

That left him all alone, on his knees with silent sobs wracking his entire frame. His ribs burned with each inhale, and he welcomed the pain. His eyes stung, yet he didn’t do anything to wipe away the tears. He just sat there, blaming himself and _pleading_ with God — a god that he didn’t think he believed in anymore — to keep his Keith safe. To protect him, to return the love of his life to him in one piece. 

At this point, he didn’t even care that God had never done him any favors. All he wanted was to hold Keith in his arms again and feel his heart beating against his own chest. 

Was that too much to _fucking_ ask?

Time flew by. 

Shiro barely noticed. 

He stayed in the same spot for what seemed like an eternity, muttering half-forgotten prayers under his breath. The tears had long since stopped falling. 

His head jerked when, once again, that wretched cell door was unlocked, and he looked up right when a body — _Keith_ — was shoved inside. Shiro managed to push up to his feet and took a few steps forward. He felt his jaw drop when he got a closer look at Keith, eyes going big from the fear and the … pure, uncontrollable rage that took over.

This time, however, it wasn’t because of any new wounds marring Keith’s pale, already blemished and battered skin.

No, that wasn’t the reason.

It was because Keith was completely naked, curled into himself in a weak attempt to hide from the world, from _everything_ . His long, tangled hair was covering his face, his arms were wrapped around his middle, and he was sobbing quietly. There were creamy purple and red fluids on his inner thighs, his hips _covered_ in hand-shaped bruises.

_So. Many. Bruises._

The moment the realization hit, Shiro whimpered, his brain rushing to _understand_ , though part of him already knew. It was a type of knowledge that physically hurt, that _burned_ . “No,” he muttered as took a few more hesitant steps towards Keith. His beautiful, precious, kind, Keith. “Oh, God, Keith.” There was a lump in his throat. Unable to help it, Shiro threw his entire body at the bars of the cell, banging and screaming and wrecking havoc and demanding for Sendak to _face him, dammit_. “You fucking bastard! How dare you touch him?! I’ll kill you. I swear to God, I’ll fucking kill you!”

“T-Takashi…?”

Shiro immediately shut up when he heard his name, quickly turning around with a wince. “Keith,” he said, voice softening, though it sounded incredibly hoarse from all the yelling. Out of pure defeat, he collapsed back to his knees, hand hovering over Keith, afraid to even touch him. 

How could he? 

His gaze suddenly traveled over to the other’s leg, a gasp escaping him. It was clearly misplaced, all twisted at a weird angle, probably dislocated from the hip. That only meant one thing. 

One awful, disgusting thing.

“Oh, sweetheart,” Shiro managed to say through a broken sob. “I’m so sorry. I’m so, so sorry.”

Keith coughed wetly, every visible muscle tense and quivering. His eyes were red and puffy when he looked at Shiro. His expression held nothing but _agony_. “Takashi,” he whispered in a ruined voice that rasped from the aftershocks of screaming “S-Sendak, he … he forced m-me. I-I didn’t … want t-t0 … I promise.” He broke off then, which only caused more tears to down his already-stained, gaunt cheeks. He looked … so guilty. Like what had just happened — something so cruel and terrible — was all his fault. “I-I didn’t want-t to.”

“I know, baby, I know,” Shiro said calmly, though it completely betrayed his current emotions. He needed to try. For Keith. He desperately wanted to gather him into his arms, to kiss him and hold him and make all of this just go away, but he knew that it wasn’t the right time yet. He would need to get through to Keith first. After being so … violated like he had been, it was a miracle that he was even speaking, that he hadn’t shut down already. 

For now, Shiro would have to verbally comfort him. Even if it took forever.

“You probably fought so hard, Keith, I know you did,” he continued. “I know you didn’t want this. I’m so sorry that that monster did it anyway.” He paused, considering what he was about to say next, Then, “And I know you might not be ready just yet, but could … Can I touch you?”

For a few, neverending seconds, Keith was silent, eyes shut tight. His body trembled so violently, Shiro was afraid it would shatter into a million pieces right then and there. The greying man almost thought that maybe Keith wouldn’t let him in, but was proved completely wrong when Keith nodded, and finally met Shiro’s dark, loving gaze. 

“Y-Yeah … I’d like -that.”

“Good,” Shiro breathed out, feeling oh so relieved. 

Without thinking anymore about it, he helped Keith sit up, making sure to keep his bareness away from any prying eyes in the other cells — though after his previous outburst, he doubted they were brave enough to even try — and then embraced him in a loose, warm hug. Keith’s tremors seemed to worsen now that he was pressed to a familiar chest, rather than one that belonged to his abuser. 

“I’m here now, sweetheart,” Shiro assured, and rested his chin atop Keith’s head. “You can rest. You must be so tired.”

The younger simply hummed in response. It was a hurt sound, a tortured sound, almost like a whine, that came from a man that was way too young to have been put through so much suffering. “Takashi?” he whispered quietly as he let his head fall onto Shiro’s shoulder. He moaned at a sudden wave of invisible pain the movement brought. “‘M l-leg hurts.”

That was when Shiro remembered. 

The dislocated hip! 

“Oh, love, I’m sorry, I completely forgot. I need to set that leg for you, don’t I? It’s not going to feel good, but I need to do it now, before it gets too swollen. Is that okay?”

Again, Keith simply nodded. Shiro had no idea how or why he was so trusting, considering that for hours, he’d been used as Sendak’s personal sex toy. That was something Shiro would probably never be able to comprehend: Keith’s faith in him never ceased to amaze and concern him — each and every time.

“Alright, Keith, I’m going to lay you down your back now,” he explained with a grim smile. “You tell me if it’s too much, okay?”

“O-Okay.”

Shiro carefully helped Keith into the proper position, silently inspecting Keith’s hip and thinking of what he would do. After explaining each and every step to his companion, he placed gentle hands onto Keith’s leg and pressed down. Poor Keith cried out softly, but otherwise didn’t move. Next, Shiro began to pull, flinching at every broken sob that Keith let out. 

“I’m almost done, sweetheart, you’re doing great,” he said soothingly, still pulling.

“H-he was so big,” Keith suddenly started saying, on the verge of babbling now because of all the shock he probably felt. “He was … s-so big, and I t-told him it w-was too m-much, b-but he didn’t … s-stop. H-He didn’t c-care. He j-just kept-t … going.”

By the time he stopped and fell silent again, Shiro’s hands were shaking with anger. Keith didn’t deserve this. Why did it have to happen to him anyway? 

How could Shiro even respond to that?

He couldn’t find anything to say that would actually help. He just had to keep going, continue to bring the love of his life more and more pain.

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, there was a crisp and painful-sounding _pop_ that resonated off the walls. 

Clearly unable to hold it back any longer, Keith wailed in agony and arched his back away from Shiro, terrified. “T-Takashi … it h-hurts s-so … m-much,” he gasped, blindly reaching for the other without knowing where exactly he was. 

Shiro swiftly caught his hand and brought it to his lips, kissing the calloused, scarred knuckles. “I’m done, baby, you did it. I’m so proud of you, Keith…” He trailed off then, due to the tears and incoming break down. This was all so hard to process. “You can rest now.”

“P-Please, d-don’t leave m-me, Takashi,” Keith said in the tiniest voice Shiro had ever heard. “D-Don’t leave … please.”

_Oh, God, how could he ever think that Shiro would ever leave him?_

“Sweetheart, I’m not going anywhere,” he assured without any hesitation that he’d felt earlier. His brain seemed to start to understand that now, more than ever, Keith needed him. And he would make sure that he knew that Shiro would never abandon him. “I’ll be right here. I promise you.”

In yet another attempt to cover Keith, he made quick work of his left pant leg, ripping off a thick piece and tying it around Keith’s waist. It wasn’t great, but it was better than nothing. Next, he carried the younger away from the exit so they’d have just a bit more privacy. He laid down first, back facing the wall so he could keep an eye on possible visitors — hopefully, there wouldn’t be any for a while — and then pulled Keith flush against him, chest to chest, tucking the top of his head right underneath his chin. 

The most important thing he needed to do right now was to hide Keith from anyone that dared to take advantage of his vulnerability. Shiro refused to let that happen again. 

He’d already failed once, he wasn’t about to do it again.

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After so long, Keith and Shiro have finally been rescued. But now comes the next, extremely difficult step: Recovery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so sorry this chapter took so long! i wanted to take my time and make it perfect.
> 
> hope you guys enjoy! thank you all for your support <3
> 
> love,  
> lin

_ Three Months Later... _

Shiro was dozing when the cell door opened, and upon looking up, he fully expected to see Sendak, or Throk, or Alkon before him. 

But for once during their entire captivity, he was wrong. 

In fact, he was so wrong, that it brought a smile to his face, one that literally  _ hurt _ . It was so wide, just because of the pure hope bubbling in his chest. He hadn’t felt that in a long, long time.

Slowly, he leaned down so he could look at the young, sleeping man in his arms and stroke his hair gently, hoping to wake him. “Keith? Keith, baby, look who’s here. Could you open your eyes for me? It’s someone special, I promise.”

It certainly took a while, but Keith did manage to stir after a few moments. His tired, glassy eyes traveled upward, and the young man’s breath hitched when he realized who exactly was in their cell, kneeling right in front of them. He immediately began to shake in Shiro’s arms. 

“ _ Mama. _ ” 

There was so much disbelief in that one, small word. And yet it carried so much  _ meaning _ . Briefly, Keith looked at Shiro for confirmation, but when the older simply nodded, still smiling widely, he began to sob, his brain convinced that this was, in fact, real. 

Krolia, his mother, someone he longed for and often talked about with Shiro, was there, watching him with an expression that screamed distress. She clearly hadn’t expected to find what she did. 

“Oh, my beautiful boy,” the woman murmured through tears. She reached out and cupped her son’s face in gentle hands, fingers brushing over his clammy, pale skin. Keith desperately leaned into her touch, even though he’d flinched at first, one hand still latched on to Shiro’s. “I’m here now, darling. I’m getting you two out of here. You’re going to be alright.

“Mama,” Keith repeated, struggling to understand, brow furrowed in uncertainty. “I-”

“Shh … don’t speak, my darling. Everything will be just fine.” Her gaze fell on Shiro, the next few words directed at him. “We have rescue ships around this entire base. Thace and his team are with the other paladins. Others are trying to find the lions. Can you walk?”

Nodding slightly, Shiro forced himself to get up, still cradling his precious burden, refusing to hand him over Krolia. Still, he sent a small  _ thank you _ her way when the woman bundled Keith in a warm, soft blanket. “Lead the way,” he said quietly, and pressed a desperate kiss to Keith’s temple, who burrowed into the comfortable fabric once he realized that he was covered for the first time in …  _ forever _ . 

Despite his weak, barely functioning legs, Shiro moved forward with a new found purpose, allowing Krolia, the actually coherent being of the three, to lead them to safety. Soon, this nightmare would be over. 

“W-What about … S-Sendak?” Keith asked fearfully, gripping onto Shiro’s arms, fingers digging into his skin almost painfully.

“Don’t worry about that now,” Krolia replied. “We’re taking care of it, Keith, I promise you.”

Keith didn’t respond to that — he just closed his eyes and tried to banish all the awful memories. 

On the way to the pods, they came across some more Blade agents, two of them carrying a stretcher, where a certain cosmic wolf was lying. His normal, beautiful dark fur was matted with blood and even missing in some spots. However, the second he found Keith, his tail started to wag, and a soft whine left him.

His owner didn’t have to say anything for Shiro to walk over to the animal, watching as Keith reached out and threaded his fingers through the familiar mane. “H-Hey, buddy,” he said shakily, still crying softly. “It’s g-good t-to … see y-you again.”

Another whimper came from Kosmo, the wolf gladly nuzzling into Keith’s trembling hand. It was almost like he was saying,  _ I missed you. I’m sorry I wasn’t there to protect you.  _

The trek to freedom continued. 

They finally made it to a huge pod within a couple minutes, where Shiro already saw Pidge and Hunk, as well as their families. They looked just as emaciated as him and Keith, the greying man thought. Hunk was holding Pidge in his arms, the two of them sobbing. When they saw their other teammates, their eyes went big. 

“Oh, my God,” Hunk breathed out, voice wrecked and scared. 

“Keith,” the younger paladin said before the other could mumble another word. “Shiro.”

Somehow, Keith found enough strength to pull away from his boyfriend, get down, and then lunge right into Pidge’s open embrace while Shiro simply collapsed in front of them all. “K-Katie,” he whispered, grasping for the younger’s neck. He jerked when a hand fell on his shoulder, but was soon able to recognize it as a friend’s. “Hunk. Y-You’re both … here.”

“We missed you so much, buddy,” was Hunk’s teary reply. Looking at Shiro, he grinned and added, “ _ Both  _ of you.”

All four of them jumped in shock upon hearing a strangled scream of pure grief. Their gazes raced to find the origin of the sound, only to find out that it was none other than Lance. He was on all fours, weeping hysterically, banging the metal floor with his fists. Coran was a few feet away from him, head hung low and pressed to his chest. 

“No, no, no, no…,” Lance was blubbering through loud sobs. “Not A-Allura, please not Allura. She can’t … she c-can’t be gone. Please, Coran, she’s a-alive. She  _ has  _ to be alive.”

“I’m so sorry, Lance,” Coran replied with a heaviness in his voice that the paladins had never heard before. Never had they heard the happy, bubbly, upbeat Coran sound so … sad. So defeated. “Allura … she’s gone.”

The minute the realization hit Keith, he whimpered, and let himself be gathered into another tight embrace by Shiro, slumping against his chest and curling into him. Neither of them said anything; they simply held onto one another and let the anguish wash over them. 

Allura was dead. 

The woman who shaped this ragtag, family-like team was gone, most likely killed by a merciless, cruel being that had no regard for anything but himself. The idea of Sendak torturing poor Allura, smiling at every one of her pleas, was enough to send Shiro spiraling into a myriad of scenarios, ones that played out in his mind and refused to leave him alone no matter how hard he tried. 

He could only imagine how Keith must have been feeling, seeing how hard he was crying now, and how he usually blamed his own actions and decisions for things out of his control. 

It made Shiro kiss his companion’s cheek gently and hunch over him, as if to keep everything else away. He had no idea if Keith relished being in his arms, or resented it. Either way, the poor thing didn’t make a sound. He simply continued to silently weep for the loss of a teammate, a friend, someone he probably never wanted to get hurt. 

They didn’t even notice that all the prisoners had been loaded into the ship — there weren’t as many people now, which said a lot. Some were quiet, others were weeping with relief and fear. Some were glaring at the Black Paladin, hatred in their eyes, but thankfully, Keith was too tired to notice. 

Shiro could tell that this prejudice wasn’t going to be let go of so easily. And that broke his heart.

Suddenly, they were flying through space, the walls vibrating around them and gasps filling the space. It was clear that none of them could believe that this was actually happening. 

About an hour after liftoff, Blade of Marmora agents began giving out water and food. A lot of times, there were people that scurried away from them, afraid of any Galra that dared to come close. 

Krolia was the one that came over to Shiro and the others. When she offered her son a bottle of filtered, clean-looking water, Keith gladly took it, hands shaking as he unscrewed the cap and brought it to his lips. He moaned in pleasure when the cool liquid hit his no-doubt parched throat. Shiro could see tears of gratitude slipping past him and falling to the ground. 

“You should eat something, Keith,” Krolia urged softly. Hesitantly, she reached forward to interlock their fingers together and squeezed. A smile blossomed at the corners of her mouth when the young man squeezed back. 

“‘M n-not hungry,” was Keith’s subdued reply. He refused to look up and face anyone. His hair was almost like a wall, separating him from even his friends, those who loved him. 

At times like these, Shiro was just thankful that at least Keith was letting  _ him _ in. That he wasn’t dead set on facing all of this alone. 

“Sweetheart, your mom’s right,” the older agreed. Even with the blanket covering his bare, abused body, Shiro could see that Keith was incredibly malnourished. It would no doubt take a while for him to get back to normal, and they both would probably have to get IVs inserted in the near future. For now, though, a simple sandwich was enough. “You need to get your strength back.”

Still, Keith refused. “I c-can’t,” he breathed out. “P-Please, don’t … make me.”

Something seemed to break inside of Krolia, because her expression faltered. “Okay, darling, we won’t make you,” she assured in a kind, motherly voice, and shared a quick look with Shiro. “But when we get to the Marmora base, we’re going to have to start taking measures to get some nutrients in you. For now, at least, just drink some water. I’ll come back with more bottles.” 

With that, she used a gentle finger to raise Keith’s chin up, leaned forward to brush her lips over his forehead, and then turned her head to whisper something in the younger’s hair. Whatever she said left Keith crying all over again. 

Shiro had no idea how he had any more tears left to spare at this point. 

All he could do was continue to hug him and send gentle assurances his way and  _ hope _ that it was enough. 

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

They arrived almost a week later. 

To this day, Shiro could never understand space time. 

The minute they did though, the paladins were rushed to a secure corner of the base, where they were assigned doctors and medical rooms. 

At first, the Blades wanted to separate Keith and Shiro, but when Keith began to struggle and  _ begged  _ them not to take Shiro away from him, they relented. 

They immediately started working on both of them.

Shiro hadn’t suffered as much as his boyfriend had. Somehow, he’d only received cracked ribs that were already starting to heal, a couple of scratches and bruises and puncture wounds that were also almost healed, and was just, overall, severely underfed and dehydrated. Just like he’d predicted, an IV had been inserted into his arm and that was that.

Keith was a whole different story. 

On top of all the emotional trauma, his physical health was a mess. He still had faint traces of bruises all over, especially on his hips. The whip lashes were nothing but puckered scabs now, but were extremely dirty and bloody. It was a miracle that all of them hadn’t gotten infected. And the one that did, all those months ago, had been doing well, thanks to the healing patches they’d gotten while in captivity. 

Thankfully, despite how hard it was, Shiro had managed to correctly set his dislocated hip in place all those months ago. The medics had told them that if he hadn’t, Keith probably wouldn’t have been able to walk again. 

It was a scary thought that sent heavy shivers up the former pilot’s spine. 

One of the newer injuries he’d received at the hands of Sendak were burns — those probably came from the bastard’s mechanical hand, a few weeks before they got rescued. That day had been so hard for both Keith  _ and  _ Shiro. Shiro had been so furious, so livid, and yet he couldn’t do anything about it. He’d had to resort to holding his Keith while the younger fought the burning that coursed through his veins, as well as a raging fever. It still hadn’t completely gone away, even now, so on top of an IV, Keith had been injected with a bunch of medicine that would hopefully fight it. 

Unfortunately for them, the Blades didn’t have access to the healing pods that the Altean Castle did. That meant that medical treatments would have to be the old fashioned way. The more painful way.

Throughout the entire series of procedures, Keith tried so hard to keep quiet. But after a while, the pain and the exhaustion and the shock of this entire situation got the better of him. It hurt Shiro so much to see Keith cry out and scream in agony every few minutes. He kept their hands linked the entire time, but even that didn’t seem to help that much.

Hours passed, and the pain seemed endless. The Blade medics worked quickly and efficiently, and they finished quite fast, considering how much they needed to treat. It left poor Keith a trembling mess, lying on a bed — an actual bed and not a cold floor, thank God — and breathing heavily, biting his lip so hard it drew blood. 

“We’ve done everything we could,” one of the doctors said. Was his name Kozen? Shiro asked himself. He promised to find out later. “We’ll check up on you every hour, but for now, you both need rest.”

“Thank you,” Shiro replied, eyes glued on Keith. “You did it, baby,” he murmured when the men left. They were alone once more. “You did so good.” 

“Sh-Shiro,” Keith breathed out, and then finally met his gaze. He looked wrecked as he vaguely gestured to the empty spot beside him. “C-Could you…?” 

It didn’t take Shiro any time at all to understand.

So much relief sunk into his heart at the thought that, even with all that happened, Keith still wanted him. That he still loved him, and needed him to get through this. Slowly and carefully, Shiro got up, ignored the vertigo that hit him, and trudged over to Keith’s bed. Paying extra attention to the long tube sticking out of him, he laid down and quickly gathered the love of his life close, similar to how he did in their cell.

Only this time, they weren’t surrounded by constant groaning and banging and headache-inducing noises. There were no more hands that would reach out to Keith with the intent to harm. Neither of them had to expect to be beat, or taunted, or  _ raped _ . Sendak would never touch either of them again. 

They were finally safe.

They could take the time to recover and get their lives back.

Shiro considered that a gift. A blessing. An answer to all of his prayers.

He didn’t have to worry about holding Keith close and having him taken away only a few hours later. He didn’t have to watch as Keith’s spirit was crushed. All he had to worry about was the here and now, which at the moment was embracing the young man and hopefully never having to let go. 

Keith visibly relaxed once Shiro joined him on the rather soft mattress, and nuzzled right into him. It didn’t take long for him to place his small, slender hands on Shiro’s chest, one pointedly above the older’s heart. A tired side left his chapped lips. “T-This doesn’t feel real,” he confessed, voice nothing but a soft rasp. 

“I know,” Shiro agreed. He, too, was practically shivering in disbelief, looking around their little room in an attempt to prove to himself that this was really happening. He’d never have imagined to actually  _ like  _ the infirmary. In the past, he would have forced his way out of there and into the comfort of his own bed. Now, he wouldn’t have minded staying here forever. He briefly wondered if Keith would be okay with that, too. “But it is, baby. It’s all real. We made it.” 

Silence surrounded them for a few short minutes, but was interrupted quickly by Keith, who was watching Shiro with a sort of wonder in his eyes. “M-Maybe when things a-are better, we c-can get married…”

The offer was so sudden, Shiro almost did a double take.

Married? To Keith. God, maybe this really wasn’t real. He’d never wanted anything more in his entire existence. And he’d certainly never expected Keith to be the one asking the question. 

Still, he wasn’t about to take it all for granted.

After all, this was always what he’d wanted most. He’d be a fool to let this opportunity go. 

“ _ Yes _ ,” he breathed out through a wet laugh, and let their lips collide in a small, loving kiss. “Yes, sweetheart, we can get married. We can ask your mom to officiate.”

Keith’s gorgeous purple eyes lit up at that. This was the happiest he’d been in a long while, Shiro realized sadly. “I’d really l-like that.” He giggled then, and at this point it was probably from all the drugs in his system rather than his actual brain. It still warmed Shiro down to the core. “K-Kosmo could be the … best m-man.”

Once again, Shiro couldn’t help but laugh. How he’d been given such a beautiful, sweet,  _ angel _ of a person to spend the rest of his life with was beyond him. “Perfect,” he murmured, because it really was. Already, his mind was coming up with ideas for rings. Above all else, that was the most important part, besides all the vows and  _ I do’s _ , of course. “That sounds perfect, Keith.”

The other was clearly about to say something else, when a yawn cut him off. Smiling weakly, he buried his face in Shiro’s chest and said, “We should p-probably … g-get some rest.

“Yeah, we should,” Shiro quickly agreed. He gently helped his future husband’s head right under his chin, arms wrapping around his thin form and lips brushing over his temple. “Sleep, baby. I’ll be right here.”

It didn’t take long for Keith to fall into a restless slumber, and soon enough, Shiro followed suit.

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

_ “You may start.” _

_ Shiro’s eyes went big as Throk turned on the machine, and pointed the long hose right at Keith. Water poured out of it and hit the young man with so much force, he went flying against a wall. He tried to curl into a tight ball in an attempt to protect himself, but the water just kept coming, his already battered skin taking the brunt of it. _

_ “Keith!” Shiro cried as he struggled in Sendak’s tight hold, forced to watch while Keith was “cleaned.”  _

_ No part of his body was left untouched — the frigid liquid went everywhere, and by the end of it, Keith was barely suppressing the heavy tremors traveling up his spine, and his brain was too tired to even form a glare on his wet face.  _

_ Every five seconds, the hose would get turned off so that he could get a chance to recover. At one point, water had even found its way up his nose, which left poor Keith coughing and sputtering and barely able to breathe. Shiro yearned to reach out to him and end this torment, but there wasn’t anything that he could do. The hands on his arms were too strong, unyielding, claws digging into his skin.  _

_ Sendak laughed each time Keith whimpered or gasped in pain. He whispered taunts and cruel comments into Shiro’s ear, laughing even harder when Shiro would jerk or hang his head in shame. The things that he said were vile, enough to make Shiro want to throw up.  _

_ He could only imagine what Keith was probably feeling.  _

_ The rough treatment continued on for what seemed like hours. By the time Throk finally finished — upon Sendak’s command, of course — Keith was visibly exhausted. His eyes were hidden behind his soaked hair, but they were no doubt closed, and he had his head resting in the crook of his arm, hiding. He was purposely making himself as small as possible, even the whimpers coming out of him tiny and quiet.  _

_ No reassuring words came to Shiro. He couldn’t bring his mouth to move to form a coherent sentence that would potentially sooth Keith. All he could do was tear his eyes away, look up at Sendak, and growl. His vision was red, he realized. Red like fire, fueled by all the anger he felt towards that disgusting creature.  _

_ “Something wrong, Champion?” said creature asked playfully, his smirk so big, Shiro wanted to just slap it off of him.  _

_ “You bastard,” Shiro ground out, unable to look at Keith anymore. He didn’t know what he would try to do if he did. None of it would have resulted in something good, so he needed to hold back. “You’ve had your fun already. What more could you possibly do to him?” _

_ “Oh, you should know by now, that there’s  _ so much _ left for me to do,” Sendak replied. He gave Throk another signal, and the Galran didn’t hesitate to turn the hose back on. He chuckled darkly when Keith outright  _ moaned _. Shiro roared in anger, still unable to do anything. Nothing at all. It only gave Sendak the green light to continue,“ Your little slut is so fun to play with, you know that, Champion? I understand now why you hold so much affection for him. I’m sure you enjoy forcing yourself inside of him just as much as I did. Maybe you’ll let me take him for another ride soon?” _

_ “Shut up!” Shiro screamed, somehow finding enough strength within himself to get up, pull away from that  _ monster _ that did such unspeakable things to the love of his life, and delivered a well placed punch to the fucker’s face. “Don’t you fucking dare talk about him like that!” _

_ Suddenly, he found himself overcome by a wave of determination. Somehow, he managed to continue hitting Sendak, kicking and punching with everything he had. Even Sendak was taken by surprise, but soon enough, he managed to get his bearings back. He blocked the next fist with ease, and before Shiro could figure out what was going on, he was being flung backwards. _

_ His back instantly exploded in pain, and sudden memories crashed into him like a truck. He could hear Keith calling him while Sendak sent boot after boot flying at his ribs, but couldn’t say anything to appease his worry, images flashing through his mind like a slideshow. Cheering filled his ears, but when he tried to cover them, more sounds seemed to assault him. Screams of agony, taunts from opponents that would soon die a gruesome death. Whippings, beatings, laughter coming from all directions, all of it was beginning to be too much. Shiro could barely breathe, could barely register that Keith, his darling Keith, was still begging for him. The words were all garbled, unrecognizable.  _

_ More laughter. This time, Shiro’s mind could tell it was Sendak, who was looming over him with interest in those awful, yellow eyes. Then, more pain, and soon after: silence.  _

_ Somewhere in the background, there were receding footsteps, followed by the harsh sound of a door being shut closed. Despite that, Shiro still couldn’t escape his own brain, moaning, writhing, surrounded by a nightmare that in reality was anything but fake.  _

_ Hands traveled up and down his body, gentle and soothing, and yet Shiro still couldn’t escape. Things were starting to get a little fuzzy, unconsciousness coming closer and closer. However, just before he lost the battle, he managed to make out the tiny whispered pleads directed at him.  _

_ They were clearly coming from Keith’s mouth. _

_ “Please, T-Takashi,” he was saying, words rushed.  _

_ Cold water dripped down his dark bangs and onto Shiro’s face — that was the only thing he could feel right now, aside from the panic and the guilt from not being able to comfort Keith. That sensation was more subdued, but nonetheless extremely powerful and suffocating.  _

_ “Please, d-don’t leave me,” Keith continued brokenly. Sobs wracked his thin frame, and he looked utterly terrified. “D-Don’t leave … m-me here, T-Takashi. P-Please. I-I need you. I need y-you…” _

_ That was when everything went black.  _

Shiro woke up with a harsh gasp, forcing his body to stay still, since he still had Keith pressed up against him and didn’t want to wake him just yet. He probably hadn’t slept this well in ages.

Looking down, he sighed at the sight of his boyfriend. Keith wasn’t moving much, but his brow was furrowed and he was mumbling incoherently, clearly stuck in the midst of a nightmare, just like Shiro had just been. 

It didn’t take much for Shiro to hug him tighter, kiss his temple soothingly. For once, he was extremely glad that his prosthetic was working again. The Blades had fixed it right up and had even promised to upgrade it in the near future. For now, though, Shiro didn’t need it for anything other than keep Keith close and keep him secure in his arms.

“I promise you, Keith, I’m not going to let anything else happen to you. I’ll be right here, by your side, whenever you need me. I promise.” 

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

It took about fifteen days for them to get discharged from the infirmary and be given actual bedrooms to sleep in. 

The only thing Shiro could think about was a nice, warm bath for him and Keith to soak in. For the last two weeks, they’d only been wiped down with wash cloths, unallowed to get up for more than five minutes. Shiro was desperate to be clean for once and let go of all that tension in his muscles; he knew Keith needed it even more than him.

That was why he took the younger into a loose hug the minute the door closed behind them before murmuring, “I think we’re both in need of a shower, aren’t we?” He meant it as a teasing remark, as something to lighten the mood, but it was so true. 

Keith simply nodded and let Shiro lead him over to the pristine, yet small, bathroom, where he patiently waited while the other set everything up. His eyes widened when Shiro stripped, a pink blush creeping on his cheeks.

His almost mystified expression made the greying man chuckle softly and take a step forward, cupping Keith’s face and kissing his forehead tenderly. “Come on, baby. We deserve this.”

The water was the perfect temperature, and Shiro immediately felt his shoulders slump in relief. He patiently waited for Keith to get comfortable, then reached for what looked like a soap bottle. 

“Let me wash your hair?” he offered. A smile graced his lips when he received another small nod, and let his shampoo-covered fingers thread themselves through Keith’s wet, long hair. It traveled down to his waist now, and if Shiro was being truthful, he thought it looked nice. He continued to massage his scalp, almost forgetting to make sure that this wasn’t too much for Keith. “Does that feel okay?” he asked.

“Yeah,” Keith said with a raspy sigh, leaning forward and thumping his head against Shiro’s broad chest. His body shook slightly, and his hands were desperately grasping for the older’s shoulders. All of these gestures hinted at a break down, so Shiro began to prepare himself for the inevitable. He, too, was struggling to keep his emotions in check.

For now, though, it was pretty calming. And Shiro wanted to make the calm last for as long as possible. He took his time washing away all the dirt and grime that had built up over the course of their captivity. He spent almost ten minutes on the shampoo alone, then moved on to some conditioner — all while marveling on how soft Keith’s locks felt against his skin. Soon enough, he took to cleaning the rest of him, falling into a sort of pattern that left his mind free to wander. 

It was … peaceful.

However, the peace was broken a few minutes later, when Shiro’s fingers unknowingly travelled down to Keith’s scarred back. Keith let out a choked gasp upon the sudden contact and looked up at Shiro, eyes wide and full of pained remembrance. “Takashi…” he whispered. 

Sudden guilt washed over Shiro at the utter fear in his boyfriend’s voice. What the hell was he doing? 

“Oh, God, Keith, I’m so sorry. I-I know, I should have asked. I just…” 

He paused then, throat closing in on him as he leaned his forehead against Keith’s. After everything that they’d been through, all he wanted to do was hold and touch and  _ feel _ him, to be assured that they were really here. Letting out a deep, long breath, Shiro continued to speak, voice hesitant and quiet. 

“I couldn’t protect you, baby. No matter what I did, you kept getting  _ hurt _ . And now we’re here, Keith. We’re here and it really does feel like a dream. And I keep thinking that I’m going to wake up at any minute and you’ll be hurt all over again. I just … I don’t think I can live through that. Not again.”

By the time he stopped, Keith was watching him with tears streaming down his gaunt cheeks, mixing with the water raining down on them. He was barely holding himself up anymore. For a few seconds, his mouth moved, but no sounds came out. It took him a bit to find his voice again, and even then, all that came out was a weak “oh,” followed by, “I’m s-sorry.” 

At that moment, he looked so  _ tired _ . 

Panic seized Shiro at that shame-filled apology. Unable to help it, he smashed his lips to Keith’s, trying to pour in all the love he had for the young man before him. He was so grateful that Keith reciprocated in earnest, and slowly, they found themselves sliding onto their knees, both of them sobbing now. Keith held onto Shiro like a lifeline, kissing him like there was no tomorrow. 

Shiro held on just as tightly, his hands raking over Keith’s entire slim frame, needing that skin-to-skin contact.

He honestly felt so broken.

“You have n-nothing to be sorry for,” he found himself saying, pressing kiss after kiss whenever and wherever he could. “I love you, Keith. I love you so …  _ so  _ much. I could never b-blame you for anything.”

At that, Keith let out a heart wrenching sob, arms tightly wound around Shiro’s back, even despite his weakened state. “I’m sorry,” he kept repeating. “Takashi, I’m so sorry…” 

Closing his eyes, Shiro continued to assure him that  _ none  _ of this was his fault. “You’re so strong, baby,” he said hurriedly. “You’re so strong, and beautiful, and kind, and amazing, and you didn’t deserve what happened to you.” The younger seemed to cry even harder from those words. Shiro wasn’t sure how much more his heart could take. “Oh, my Keith. My beautiful Keith. I’m right here. We’re here, we’re safe. Just let it out, sweetheart. You’re okay now. We’re going to be okay.”

Slowly, Keith switched from desperate apologies to even more desperate declarations of, “I love you, I-I love you, I  _ love you _ .”

“I know, baby, I know,” Shiro murmured. “ _ God _ , I love you so much. You’re my everything…”

“I-I just want the pain … to s-stop,” Keith said after a while, lips moving against Shiro’s shoulder blade. “I-I feel so … dirty.” He looked up, gasping. “I d-don’t deserve  _ you _ .”

“You’re not dirty, Keith. Nothing could ever make you dirty.” Shiro smiled ever so slightly, and leaned in for a soft kiss, one that Keith thankfully returned. They could both taste salt in their mouths. “What Sendak did to you doesn’t make you dirty. Not at all. Dammit, I should have protected you from him, Keith, I know. I’m so sorry I couldn’t. God knows it’s me who doesn’t deserve you. But  _ you _ deserve all good things, sweetheart. I promise I’ll try to give you them, as much as I can.”

Sniffling, Keith took a moment before he finally nodded in understanding. “Y-You already are,” he breathed out, and pushed up to mash their mouths together once more. “Th-Thank you, Takashi. For b-being here.”

Shiro didn’t reply. 

He just continued to kiss and kiss the man he loved more than life itself for as long as he possibly could, the two of them kneeling underneath the spray and helping one another heal. 

And silently promising themselves to make it through this, to survive. To get married, and start a family. To move past the trauma, to get their lives back. 

Promising to be the Shiro and Keith they were before everything fell apart. 

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

Hours after their shower, Shiro and Keith migrated over to their brand new bed, dressed in some simple grey sweatpants the Blades somehow got their hands on. Shiro thought that it was probably Krolia’s doing, but decided not to dwell on it. This was clothing that was actually comfortable — unlike the prison rags they’d worn — and that wouldn’t be snatched away from them. That was all that mattered.

It had taken a while for the two of them to calm down from all the grief and panic, and it wasn’t until the water went cold that Shiro realized that some sleep under warm covers was definitely in order.

It didn’t take much for Keith to curl up into Shiro’s side, like always, and rest his head against the older’s broad chest. For him, hearing his companion’s heartbeat was vital. Shiro never said anything. He understood. He needed that same reassurance, only through interlocked fingers and gentle kisses. 

The tremors coursing through Keith’s figure still refused to cease. He held onto Shiro with all the strength he had left, cheeks tear-stained, eyes clenched shut, brow furrowed in thought. Meanwhile, Shiro had his fingers carding through the other’s hair again, hopefully providing enough comfort to soothe. 

They lay in comfortable silence for what seemed like forever, sometimes pulling away to stare at each other in order to convince themselves that this was real. Sometimes, Keith would even lean forward to kiss Shiro, lingering for as long as he dared and basking in the familiar feeling of dizzying adoration. 

At one point, they simply cuddled and did nothing else, taking the time to recharge and recover. Keith had taken to drawing on Shiro’s arm, sketching out random patterns that included tiny little hearts. When Shiro realized what it was that Keith was doodling, he smiled and pressed his lips to the younger’s temple, murmuring yet another soft  _ I love you _ in his ear. 

“I can’t feel Black anymore,” Keith confessed a few seconds later, words tired and hesitant. 

The quiet sentence hit Shiro like a truck, and he sighed heavily as he tightened his arms around his beloved. “Not at all?” he asked, almost afraid of the answer. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew what it meant if Keith’s connection to his lion was lost. 

It didn’t mean anything good.

“Not at all,” was Keith’s sad reply. “I-I think Send-” He suddenly stopped himself, jerked slightly, but then continued almost right away. “The Galra, I think they got to her and the others. They’re gone.”

“I’m sure everyone will want to hold a meeting in the next couple of days,” Shiro said, ever the voice of reason. “We’ll find out. Maybe the lions were just damaged.”

But Keith just shook his head. “I’d still sense her,” he mumbled. “I can’t feel our connection … at all.” Another pause. “I miss her,” he said weakly, and buried his face in the crook of Shiro’s neck. “A l-lot.”

Before the simple statement of “I know” left his mouth, Shiro clamped it shut. Because what did he know? He hadn’t felt Black in his head in ages now. Sure, he felt a little bit empty without her, but for a while, he’d had the Atlas. Now, neither of them had anything, and yet Keith’s loss was probably much worse than Shiro’s. 

So, instead of saying that God forsaken phrase he was getting so tired of, Shiro continued to kiss into Keith’s hair and whispered, “I’m sorry, baby.” Hopefully, that would be enough.

“I know you are. So am I.”

Before he knew it, Shiro felt himself being pulled to sleep, protectively holding onto Keith like he expected him to be taken away. The more he thought about it, the more he realized that that’s probably exactly what he was doing. 

Expecting for tragedy to strike again. 

While nightmares didn’t plague him too much, they  _ assaulted  _ Keith. Whenever Shiro woke up, it was because of soft whimpers coming from Keith’s direction, echoing off the walls and shattering his heart. 

Sometimes, he would try to arch away, almost as if he was being hit. Other times, he begged, pleaded with his inner demons to  _ leave me alone _ or  _ please, stop hurting me _ . Shiro tried anything he could think of to help, but there really wasn’t much to do. He simply had to wait out the nightmare with Keith, whispering gentle assurances into his ear. 

Finally, almost an eternity later, Keith managed to break out of the vice that kept him stuck inside his own mind, gasping awake with a choked sob. He didn’t say anything as he pressed up against Shiro and evened out his breathing, shivering. The older didn’t say anything either, unsure of what to tell him. 

How many more  _ It’s okay _ ’s could he possibly force out?

Right when he was about to offer to leave the room and walk around, there was a soft knock at their door, one that made both of them jump in fear. It took a second for Shiro to figure out that this wasn’t any of their captors, since there was no way that those bastards would have actually  _ knocked _ before entering their cell.

“It’s Krolia,” the voice from outside announced, and at that, Keith seemed to visibly deflate. 

“Come in, mom,” he said loudly enough for her to hear, arms wrapping around Shiro’s arm and head dropping to his shoulder. 

As Krolia came in, Shiro looked up at her with gratitude in his eyes. Maybe she could help Keith. Maybe he wasn’t just enough. “Hey, Krolia,” he said softly, smiling when the older woman sat down on the bed. 

“Hello,” she said, and locked gazes with her son. “How are you two doing, darling?”

“We took a shower,” Keith said simply, a single tremor traveling up his spine. 

“That’s good,” Krolia replied. She slowly reached up to cradle Keith’s face in one hand, the other moving to rest on Shiro’s shoulder. “Were you sleeping? You look exhausted.”

“I’m okay,” Keith mumbled, clearly ashamed of having a bad dream. 

“He had a small nightmare,” Shiro supplied, much to Keith’s annoyance. “I think we’re still getting used to …  _ being  _ here.”

“That’s to be expected. There's no shame in it,” Krolia said with a grim smile. “I just came here to check up on you, and let you know that the other paladins would like to hold a meeting of sorts sometime soon. We have a lot to discuss.”

“About the lions? And S-Sendak?” Keith asked dreadfully, body tense and rigid. 

“Yes, about them. I’m afraid that monster managed to escape before we could get to him. With the lions.”

Keith’s breath hitched when the pieces in his head clicked. “The lions…” he repeated. “So, they really are gone?”

“We’re working on getting them back, but as of now, we have no idea where they are.” Krolia let out a heavy sigh. “I’m so sorry, Keith,” she breathed out, and leaned forward to press her forehead to Keith’s own. “We’ll find them. It will just take some time.”

The only response she got was a weak nod.

Shiro closed his eyes briefly to try and fight off the incoming tears.  _ This shouldn’t be happening,  _ he thought. “When will this debriefing take place?”

“Hopefully in the next few days.”

“Are the others okay?” 

“They’re in recovery, but they’re more or less alright.” As Krolia pulled away from her son, she looked at his boyfriend, who had buried his face in Keith’s hair. “Would you like some food? I could bring you something.”

“Yes, food sounds good,” Shiro said softly. “Thank you, Krolia.”

“Of course. Anything for my beautiful boy and the love of his life.”

The bluntness of Krolia’s explanation sent a blush crawling up Shiro’s cheeks, causing him to smile weakly and hug Keith close once more. 

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

Keith gasped when they finally entered the debriefing hall, eyes roaming around and falling on each one of the other Paladins. Their friends. 

He and Shiro were immediately taken off guard by a wild Pidge launching herself into their arms, but the former could tell that his companion was more than grateful to touch the young woman again. 

“It’s so good to see you,” Pidge muttered. 

“You, too, Pidge,” Shiro said quickly, and pressed a chaste kiss to Keith’s cheek, who didn’t say anything. He was just content to bask in Pidge’s warmth silently, lips pressed to the top of her head.

Hunk came next. However, he approached the couple from behind, placing a big, gentle hand right on Keith’s shoulder, only to jump back at the barely contained whimper that left the raven-haired pilot’s mouth. “Keith?” he said after the sudden shock wore off. His eyes were sad as he watched his friend — someone Shiro knew Hunk looked up to, really — pull away from Pidge and step back, almost hiding behind Shiro. 

It took a few moments for Keith’s brain to understand, and when he did, he hung his head in embarrassment. “‘M sorry, Hunk,” he mumbled quietly, desperately clinging to Shiro’s hand. “You j-just … caught me off guard.”

“Oh, it’s not a problem!” Thankfully, Hunk recovered quickly, seemingly comprehending that Keith had been through a lot and had a lot of trauma now, much more than usual. The Yellow Paladin used slow movements to reach for Keith and take his small hand in his own big one. “We’ve all been through a lot. I get it. Don’t apologize, okay?”

Before Keith could reply, someone pointedly cleared their throat. Upon locating who it was, Shiro was not surprised to see Kolivan standing at the back of the large, long table they were to be using for this meeting. His hands were clasped behind him, and his expression held a lot of sympathy for each and every single person in the room. Keith especially.

Krolia was at his right side, along with a few other Blades. On the left were supposedly where the paladins, Coran, and Shiro would be sitting. Lance was already there, though he hadn’t gotten up to greet neither Keith nor Shiro. He simply nodded at them as they passed by, and then continued to sulk with his chin pressed to his chest. Clearly, the loss of Allura was seriously affecting him. The spark that he usually had in bright blue orbs was completely gone. Shiro wondered if he and the others looked somewhat similar. Coran didn’t look much better himself, but at least he had smiled grimly and murmured a small apology to them when they walked over to him. 

Nobody said anything when Keith planted himself right on Shiro’s lap instead of a separate chair, curling into his side and pillowing his cheek on his chest. Almost on instinct, Shiro carefully maneuvered the younger’s thick braid over his shoulder so it wouldn’t be a bother. He quite liked it, actually. His mother had offered to fix Keith’s hair up so it wouldn’t drive him crazy during the debriefing, and it really did look good on him. Secretly, Shiro hoped that he would keep his hair this way. 

Though he also knew that it didn’t matter — Keith was always beautiful no matter what.

“Alright, let’s get started,” Kolivan announced as he sat himself down. “I would like to preface this by saying how glad I am to have all of you here, safe and on the path to recovery. I understand how difficult it must have been to go through what you went through. I promise to do my best to catch Sendak and his followers and punish them for what they did.”

At the mention of his abuser, Keith visibly tensed and interlocked his fingers with Shiro’s. Thankfully, the Blades leader didn’t seem to notice. Or at least chose not to comment. 

“I think it is important to let you know that your planet has been imprisoned by the Galra. We do not know what happened to all the civilians when the raids started taking place, but we believe that they are being used as labor slaves. From the intel that we gathered, it looks like Sendak had planned to turn Earth into the new Galra capital.” 

A pause and a sigh. 

Then, “Now, in regards to the lions. Unfortunately, we were not able to take them with us during your rescue. Our priority was getting everyone off that ship, and by the time we were ready to search for them, Sendak was able to escape with them in tow. We have no idea where he is now or where he’s going, but I have agents working day and night to try and find him. When we do, we will apprehend him, get the lions back, and take him into custody. I will let you decide what to do with him when the time comes.”

“I say we kill him,” Pidge offered, voice low and grim. Her fists were clenched, knuckles practically white, and she had a scowl on her face. Tears glossed over her tired eyes, but refused to fall. “He let his  _ fucking  _ guards kill my mom. He deserves to rot in Hell.”

Shiro could hear the collective gasps that echoed through the room when the realization hit. Katie had lost someone, too. Her mother, nonetheless. Her family was probably in shambles now, surrounded by grief and guilt. And here Pidge was, at this meeting, instead with her father and brother mourning. 

Anger began to course through him. 

“God, Pidge, I’m so sorry,” he said genuinely, watching as Keith turned to the side so he could squeeze her hand, sending silent support her way. “I had no idea…”

“It’s in the past,” Pidge said sharply, though the statement was followed by a sniffle. “Let’s just figure out what we’re gonna do now.”

“That’s what we wanted to ask you,” Krolia suddenly began. “I think the best thing for all six of you to do is take the time to get better. What was done to you was unforgivable. It wouldn’t be fair to any of you to go back out there now.”

“I agree,” Coran said, not sounding quite as chipper as he used to. “We all need a few phoebs to recover. We can figure out what to do next at a later date. And in the meantime, the Blade of Marmora will help however they can. I believe-”

He was interrupted by a sudden bang. 

It was Lance, his fist growing red underneath over the hard surface he’d just hit. He was standing up now, body all coiled up and expression full of fury. “There’s no fucking point,” he growled out, gaze traveling to everyone around him. “The lions are gone, so is Allura, and Earth’s been completely taken over. It’s stupid to think that we can fix any of this. We might as well quit while we’re ahead.”

The Red Paladin’s heated speech left everyone in stunned silence, staring at Lance with shock written across their faces. After all, nobody would have ever expected him of all people to completely lose hope. 

Shiro barely even registered that Keith had stood up and was stumbling towards his former rival, current best friend. “Lance…,” he whispered weakly as he placed a trembling hand on the younger’s arm. 

“What, Keith?!” Lance spat, jerking away from Keith in a way that made the other’s breath hitch sharply. “You gonna give me some kind of  _ inspirational  _ pep talk that’s gonna make me change my mind? I don’t think you understand —  _ we lost _ . We lost, God dammit.” A choked laugh escaped him. “But of course  _ you  _ wouldn’t give up. You’re too fucking stubborn for your own good. You should just accept it, Keith. There’s nothing-”

Keith’s soft cry of anguish cut Lance off, and suddenly, he was being pulled into a tight hug, right as he broke down. 

When Keith looked up at Shiro, who was watching as Lance began to sob quietly, it hurt to see his eyes so heartbroken. He, too, was crying, barely able to stop the wrecked sobs from escaping his chapped lips. “I’m sorry, Lance,” he whispered into Lance’s ear. “I’m so, so sorry.”

“You still d-don’t get it,” the younger tried to say, voice breaking off into a hiccup. He tried to pull away, but Keith wouldn’t let go. “Allura’s  _ dead _ . There’s no point anymore. Y-You don’t understand. You don’t-”

“I do,” Keith said gently, face buried in the other’s brown hair. “I do, Lance, I promise. I understand. Just … let it out. It’s okay. I’m right here.”

“N-Nothing’s okay…”

“It will be, Lance. I promise you, it will be.”

As Shiro tried to commit this whole scene to memory, he realized that he’d never felt so proud of the man he was privileged enough to call his. 

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

On the way back to their room, finally having finished debriefing, Shiro made an effort to go slow, allowing Keith to take in his surroundings and marvel at the endless space around them. They both took about fifteen minutes just staring out a window and watching everything go by. 

“It’s so pretty,” Keith said quietly, leaning against Shiro with his arms wrapped around the older’s waist. 

“It is,” Shiro agreed, but he wasn’t looking at the stars anymore. He was still reeling with pride for what Keith did to comfort Lance. Seeing the man he loved more than life act so strong even with everything that happened to him was so inspiring to him, and he silently vowed to make sure Keith knew that. 

“To be honest, I didn’t think I’d ever see this again,” Keith continued. Sighing heavily, he let his head fall on Shiro’s shoulder, a tiny smile gracing the corner of his mouth. It was breathtaking. “I’m glad I was wrong.”

“Oh, baby…,” Shiro breathed out, and kissed Keith’s temple tenderly. “I’m so happy we’re here. Together.” 

“Me, too,” Keith mumbled sleepily, looking up at his companion with so much adoration in his amethyst eyes. “God, I can’t wait to marry you,” he confessed, voice shy but genuine. He had a hand on Shiro’s neck now, gently playing with his short tufts of hair. 

The older man had never, ever, felt this loved, he realized. And that was a realization that warmed him to the core and made his stomach flutter in the best way possible. “Soon, Keith, soon. I promise.”

They didn’t say much after that — simply standing in each other’s arms, hugging tightly, was more than enough. By the time Shiro decided that it was probably time to get back to their room, he was feeling rather tired, so he guessed Keith was just as spent, too.

“Come on,” he urged as he pulled the other along. “Bedtime.”

At that, Keith let out a teasing whine, his gorgeous grin still there and lighting up Shiro’s world. “ _ Fiiiine _ ,” he drawled, the annoyance in his voice making Shiro chuckle. 

The pure joy warming his belly was enough to have him tug Keith close and kiss him deeply, pouring everything he had into that one gesture. He could feel his future husband melting against him, kissing just as passionately. 

After they separated, they walked hand in hand to their quarters, silent but comfortable. Every once in a while, Shiro would sneak glances over to his other half, smiling to himself and thanking whoever was up there for letting them have this. 

Right as they were about to open up their door and head inside, however, incoming footsteps made themselves known, and Shiro tensed as he and Keith spun around to see who it was. Even though they were more relaxed than ever before, they were still on alert, too paranoid to ever stop looking for danger. 

Three Garrison officers soon came into view. None of them looked familiar, but it didn’t even matter, because they were immediately looking at Keith with resentment written across their faces. 

“There he is, there’s the Galra halfbreed!” one exclaimed mockingly, advancing on the couple without any regard for their personal space. 

On instinct, Shiro moved to stand in front of Keith, blocking the officer from coming any closer. He couldn’t allow for Keith to get hurt  _ again _ . They’d already made it this far. “State your business,” he said in his  _ Commander Shiro _ voice, as Keith liked to call it. The familiar feeling of the younger’s fingers clutching his arm grounded him, prevented him from doing anything too rash too quickly. Usually, the roles would be reversed, but sometimes, even Shiro had a limit. 

“Oh, we just came to check on the former  _ Black Paladin _ ,” the same soldier replied, a predatory glint in his eye. “Wanted to see how he’s doing.”

“It looks like he’s living the life,” someone else said coldly. “I see he’s still following his  _ master  _ around like a lost puppy, isn’t he? What, you don’t know how else to function without another person to lean on?”

Shiro fought the urge to growl. “I’m afraid you’re a little over the line there,” he said. “How about you move along and we’ll both pretend this didn’t happen?”

“Oh, right, like my family and friends getting killed right in front of me  _ didn’t happen _ ,” the leader of the group snarled. “We all know it’s Kogane’s fault. He should have figured out a way to keep all of us safe. Instead, half of the entire Garrison is now dead, and our planet under  _ your _ control.” 

The bastard paused then, still glaring at Keith, who wasn’t necessarily hiding behind Shiro but not saying anything to defend himself either. With a menacing chuckle, the man suddenly spit right at Keith’s feet, making both him and Shiro jump in surprise. 

“Fucking Galra scum.”

Ultimately, that — and the fact that Keith’s body was now trembling ever so slightly — was what finally broke the camel’s back for Shiro.

“HEY!” he roared, surprising both himself and Keith as he straightened up and took a step forward. “Show some respect. The Black Paladin is still your commanding officer, with or without his lion. And just because we are not on the Atlas anymore, that doesn’t mean I am not your admiral. I’m letting this slide this time, but if you, or anybody else, even  _ thinks  _ of pulling a stunt like this again, your punishment will be severe.” 

For a few neverending seconds, you could literally hear a pin drop. Shiro was staring at the officer who dared to mistreat Keith with pure daggers and enough rage on his face to have the other cowering in fear. 

Somehow, though, Shiro found the strength to calm down and continue.

“I understand that you all went through a lot, and probably lost people you cared about. But so did  _ we _ . So did Commander Kogane. Save your energy and your anger for when we work on taking back what’s ours. Don’t take it out on the person who did everything to protect  _ all of you _ , but just couldn’t do it on his own.”

With that, Shiro grabbed Keith’s shaking hand and led him to their original destination, letting the door slide on the shocked officers without even a second glance. The minute they were alone, he turned to Keith and enveloped him in a bone crushing embrace, sighing into his hair and letting out a deep breath he didn’t even know he was holding.

“Are you alright?” he asked softly, and pulled back so he could press their lips together again. 

“Yeah,” Keith replied rather shakily, clearly a little floored by what happened. “Honestly though, that was probably the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen.”

When the words set in his brain and actually became coherent, Shiro couldn’t help but explode into laughter, grinning like a fool as he rewarded Keith with gentle kisses. 

He didn’t even have to say anything, because Keith was chuckling too, eyes bright with that spark Shiro honestly never thought he’d see again. 

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

A few nights later, they decided to have sex for the first time.

Shiro had been reluctant at first, worrying that this was going to be too much for both of them, but Keith convinced him. 

“I want to try,” he had said in explanation, pressing gentle kisses to the other’s neck. “I want to get over what …  _ he  _ did to me. I want  _ you _ .”

However, Shiro should have known that Keith wasn’t ready.

They had started out slow, having stuck to just kissing for what seemed like an eternity, before moving on to more. Sooner or later, clothes were starting to disappear from their bodies, and within an hour, Shiro found himself hovering over the love of his life, lining himself up, preparing himself to slide into Keith. 

He hadn’t realized just how much he’d missed this.  _ Them _ . 

But right as he was about to finally do it, poor Keith let out a scared little whimper, which ultimately brought Shiro back to reality. His companion was looking at him with wide, scared eyes, breathing way too hard and gripping onto the bedsheets way too tight. 

All too quickly, the dream of being able to return back to normalcy was shattered. 

“T-Takashi,” Keith choked out, crying out again as he tried to move but was trapped by Shiro’s large, muscular body. “I-I know that y-you’re there, b-but … he’s there t-too.” Another distressed noise left him. “He’s w-watching m-me ... T-Takashi … I c-can’t. P-Please. Don’t … h-hurt me…”

“Hey, hey, Keith, you’re okay.” Shiro immediately took action, slowly moving to Keith’s side as he cupped his cheek in his human hand all while still keeping his distance. He didn’t want Keith to get even more overwhelmed. “I’m not gonna hurt you, sweetheart, you know that.”

Keith’s breathing was starting to get too labored, eyes wide and utterly terrified while he stared at the corner of their room. That was probably where Sendak was, Shiro guessed, and the thought that that sadistic creature was still haunting his love even now was enough to send pangs of rage up his spine. 

For now, though, he would have to focus on calming Keith down. Then he could think of ways to slowly kill their torturer. 

“He’s not here, baby,” he continued, thumb brushing away the tears streaming down the younger’s cheeks. “You’re imagining him. He’s not here, I am. Can you look at me, Keith? Please, just … hone in on me.”

Thankfully, Keith managed to listen to him after a couple moments of tense silence, broken only by his ragged gasps. He desperately locked gazes with Shiro, eyes raking over his loyal companion in order to convince his brain that  _ he _ was the one in front of him, not Sendak. “Takashi…,” he whispered in realization, and launched himself into Shiro’s awaiting arms without any hesitation. 

“That’s right, Keith,” the other assured, relief lacing his words. “That’s it, there you go. I’m right here. Breathe, baby, you’re alright. Just breathe.”

“I-I thought I was r-ready,” Keith said brokenly once the panic seemed to die down a bit. He had his face buried in the crook of Shiro’s neck, and tremors were wracking his entire thin frame, no doubt close to being painful. “I-I thought-”

“I know, sweetheart, I know,” Shiro murmured, having cut him off in an attempt to stop those dangerous feelings of guilt and shame from consuming them both. “It’s okay that you’re not. I’m so happy that you wanted to try, but I understand that it was too soon. I think we both just need a little more time.”

“But I d-don’t want to wait,” Keith said through soft sobs. “I w-want to be normal again … I w t-to show you t-that I…” He trailed off then, unable to finish his sentence. It took a bit for him to find his voice again and continue. “He’s i-in my head, Takashi,” he admitted, pushing himself impossibly closer to Shiro. “H-He won’t leave me alone…”

That simple confession made Shiro’s heart drop painfully to his stomach. He, too, had had this exact feeling when this all began, when he’d just been rescued by Keith all those years ago and was suddenly being launched into space again, this time to fight in a  _ war _ . Sendak had terrorized him, his presence always there, taunting him, torturing him even though he was finally free. Keith was the one who had always helped him through particularly bad days, no matter what. It only seemed right for Shiro to now do the same for him. 

“I know,” he said simply, and peppered the top of Keith’s head with gentle, loving kisses. “Sweetheart, I know how hard this is for you. You know that I’ve been there. But I got through it, because of you. It’s my turn to help you now, okay? And if that means waiting until you’re ready, then I’ll wait. For as long as it takes.”

The familiar phrase had Keith’s breath catching in his throat. He began to cry harder, clearly making an effort to stay quiet, and his hands were hastily running all over Shiro’s toned body, not sure what exactly they were looking for. 

“I’m always gonna be here,” Shiro said softly. Carefully, he used his index finger to raise Keith’s chin up so he could plant a long kiss to those beautiful lips of his. “You don’t have to do this alone.” Once he received a small nod, as well as another sweet kiss, Shiro managed to smile. “I love you, Keith. I always will.”

“I l-love you, too,” the younger replied. He maneuvered himself so that he would be spooning against Shiro, taking his hand and clutching it to his chest. Shiro could feel Keith’s racing heart beneath his fingers, and he ached to fully calm Keith down as soon as possible. “C-Could you … could you t-tell me what o-our lives will be l-like … wh-when all of t-this is over?”

While the question did surprise him a bit, Shiro was quick to figure it all out and come up with his answer. “Well, first we’ll get married,” he started, lips moving against the top of Keith’s head. His free hand was drawing soothing patterns on the other’s thin, but muscular, arm. “Then we’ll fix everything else. After the war, though, I think we’re going to just build a big house right next to your shack. We’ll have lots of bedrooms so the others would always have a place to stay, and we can even build a separate room for Kosmo.”

Shiro took a moment to check up on his companion, to make sure that he was doing at least a little better. Keith had his eyes clenched tight now, a couple of stray tears still escaping them, but his breathing was a little more even, and his pulse was slower. 

Good. That was exactly what Shiro needed.

“We’ll wake up every morning in a big, soft bed, and go to sleep in each other’s arms,” he went on, lost in his own story. “For the first few years, it’ll just be the two of us, but maybe someday, we’ll adopt a beautiful child and call him or her ours. I can already imagine it, Keith. You’re going to be such an amazing father.”

Keith’s cheeks turned red right when he said that last bit, and he curled up into a tighter ball just to hide his embarrassment. “So are you,” he murmured in response.

“We’ll both work at the Garrison. Sometimes, you’ll head out for a Blades mission, but you’ll try to come back as soon as possible. And your family is going to greet you the minute you walk through the door. It’ll be so incredible, sweetheart. We’re gonna spend the rest of our lives with each other, and it’ll just be … so perfect. I can’t wait to be able to do all of that and more, Keith. I can’t wait to finally have a chance to do what we’ve always wanted to do, without anything else in the way.”

When he finally finished, Shiro helped Keith carefully turn around so that they could lock gazes. This time, the tears weren’t there because of any pain or fear or guilt. They were there from the pure contentment they both felt in that moment. 

“That sounds amazing,” Keith whispered after a while, still looking at Keith with unwavering love written across his face, as well as this expression of  _ longing _ . “I can’t wait to do all that, too.”

“That’s why, baby, I don’t expect you to take this next step just yet,” Shiro said softly, and leaned in to capture Keith’s mouth in a kiss. “Take your time. I’m not going anywhere, I promise you. I’ll wait for as long as I need to. Okay, Keith?”

Nodding, Keith smiled softly and wrapped himself around Shiro, nuzzling into his cheek while the older let his hands roam free. “Okay,” he murmured with a breathy sigh. “Thank you, Takashi. For everything.”

And for the first time in a very long time Shiro genuinely felt like things were going to be okay. 

“You never have to thank me, Keith. I’m yours. Forever and always.”

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

“Shiro? Your vows?”

Krolia’s soft, urging voice brought a bright smile to Shiro’s face, and he briefly looked down at the strong, capable hands he was holding in his own. This was it. This was happening. 

They were finally getting married. Weeks after Shiro promised Keith to always be there, they finally managed to find a date to make it official. 

It had taken a lot of strength for Shiro to ask for Krolia’s blessing to marry her son. He’d been anxious at first, worried that she would say no, or would disapprove, but it had been much easier than he’d thought. The older woman had easily said yes, and that she wouldn’t have trusted anybody else to take care and love Keith for the rest of their lives. 

That, really, was all he needed. The next thing he knew, Shiro and Keith figured out when to do it, where to do it, and how they would do it. The rest of their team wouldn’t be joining them, since Keith and Shiro decided that they really didn’t want to open up any new wounds, but that was okay, too. Maybe when they got Earth back, they could have a proper wedding, with everyone there to support them.

The Blades helped them build a small altar in one of the debriefing rooms, and honestly, it couldn’t have been any less perfect. Just like they’d discussed all those months ago, Krolia was the one officiating, and Kosmo was the equivalent of the best man. He was the one holding onto the rings.

And oh, the rings. 

Shiro had worked on them separately, knowing that Keith wasn’t expecting anything, but would appreciate it greatly. That was why the former pilot made sure to get the best ones possible, even asking Kolivan for some luxite and some assistance in creating the most beautiful bands either of them had ever seen. Shiro was both excited and nervous about presenting them to his future husband. 

It would be a shame if Keith didn’t end up liking them. 

But, for now, he would have to push all those worries aside, because it was time for his vows. He’d worked so hard on them, too, trying to put into words everything that he felt for Keith without making it too long. The idea that he would now have to recite them in front of him was forming butterflies in his stomach, and he had to take a deep, steadying breath before he began.

“Keith,” he said quietly, pouring all the emotions he currently felt into that one, simple name. “You are my best friend. My savior. The love of my life. You’ve saved me more times than I can count, and even at our lowest points, you still trusted me, still allowed me to get close and try to help. 

“When we met, and, God, that feels like an eternity ago, you were hurting, afraid to let anybody in. Somehow, though, you saw something in me, and you welcomed me into your life. You let me make a difference, and show you that you were deserving of love and respect. That you were capable of great things. In return, you always treated me like an equal, not like some Garrison posterboy. You loved me five times as hard, and that love was what kept me going to the harshest times of my life. You … you mean so much to me. And I don’t think I could ever thank you enough for everything that you did. 

“So, as I’m standing here now, on the verge of a _complete_ _mental_ _breakdown_ because I really can’t believe that this is happening, I can confidently say that this is the best decision I’ve probably ever made. I am so excited to start this new chapter of our lives. I love you, baby. Forever and always.”

The minute he finished, Shiro felt a wave of dizziness crash into him, and he had to give Keith’s hands yet another squeeze in order to ground himself. He finally looked up at his partner, his other half, with a half-crooked smile tugging at his lips. Keith was staring at him with shining eyes, happiness  _ radiating  _ off of him like never before. 

Neither of them said anything as Shiro took out one of the rings from the little basket hanging from Kosmo’s mouth and slipped it onto Keith’s finger. It fit just right, the dark, matte metal complimenting its wearer’s pale, smooth skin. 

“It’s beautiful,” Keith managed to choke out once the shock seemed to wear out. He took another second just to study his hand before looking at his mother, sniffling quietly. 

“Whenever you’re ready, darling,” Krolia murmured in that kind, soothing voice Shiro had come to love.

Clearing his throat, Keith’s gaze fell on Shiro again, steady and full of purpose. “You know,” he began, “when I first met you, I … didn’t think that you would stick by me. I thought that you would take one look at me and just leave, because nobody ever wanted to be friends with a broken, angry boy that didn’t know what he was doing. I’d learned that the hard way. 

“But … you  _ stayed _ . You stayed and you chose to love me. You never gave up on me, Takashi. Even when we found out I’m Galra, the race that brought you so much pain, you chose to look past that and kept on loving me. That is something I don’t think I’ll ever be able to pay you back for.

“And I know that you’re constantly saying that I saved your life, but in reality it’s the complete opposite. If you hadn’t found me when you did, I probably wouldn’t have made it this far. And if you hadn’t done what you did after everything we went through in the last few months, I genuinely don’t think I would have been able to get through it all. 

“You’re the light of my life, Takashi Shirogane. And I just want you to know that I’m just …  _ so happy  _ right now. I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy, and it's all because of you. I’m so grateful that I’m the one you’re choosing to be with forever. I promise you I’ll always try to be worthy of your love.”

A weak sob that was mixed with a joyful laugh left Keith then, and he grinned, indicating that he was done. Taking his time, he reached for Shiro’s ring and put it on. It fit, too, and for a few seconds, the two of them just stared at it, marveling at its beauty and it’s meaning. 

It took so much self control for Shiro not to launch at Keith and kiss him senseless while Krolia finished up her speech. By the time she pronounced them husband and husband and gave them permission to finally seal the deal, he was more than ready to pounce. 

Without any hesitation, he took a step forward, cupped Keith’s face in both hands, and crashed their mouths together in a long, powerful kiss. It lasted for what seemed like ages, and when they pulled away, they were both blushing and smiling widely. 

“I love you,” Shiro proclaimed. The way Keith’s eyes watered from that one eight letter phrase was enough to convince him to do it again and again, until the end of time.

“I love you, too,” his husband replied, and pulled him in for another kiss. 

That night, sex came easily to them. 

No bad memories terrorized Keith this time, and not once did he have another panic attack. It all felt so right, coaxing one another to their climax on their wedding day, after not having done it for so long. They were so excited, they even went for multiple rounds.

By the time they finished, they were utterly exhausted, but in the best way possible. For a while, Shiro just hovered over Keith, hands between the other’s head, while watching him with wonder in his eyes. 

Why did he have to be so breathtaking? 

Keith had his hair all around him like a halo, reminding Shiro of an angel.  _ His angel. _ His lips were swollen and red, and his eyes were closed, breathing heavy. He was the definition of incredible, and Shiro felt so damn blessed to have gotten this far. 

In the end, all of their struggles really were worth it. 

Slowly, he lowered himself down to his side and pulled Keith close. The younger immediately curled into him, hands splayed on his chest, their legs interlaced. “Hey,” Shiro said softly, and waited for Keith to look up before kissing once more, just because he could. 

“Hey,” Keith echoed, voice raspy. “That was…”

“Incredible,” the older finished for him before chuckling so softly. “We did it, Keith.”

“Yeah, we did.”

“I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you, baby.”

“Me, too.”

The End

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

_ Just as all is born is new, _

_ Do know what I say is true, _

_ That I’ll be loving you always. _

_ Until the rainbow burns the stars out in the sky, _

_ Until the ocean covers every mountain high, _

_ Until the dolphin flies and parrots live at sea, _

_ Until we dream of life and life becomes a dream.  _

—  _ Stevie Wonder  _ —

￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> did you like it? leave a comment, kudos, or bookmark!!
> 
> thanks for reading.

**Author's Note:**

> did you like it? leave a comment or kudos or bookmark! i'd really appreciate it <3
> 
> i'll try to update as quick as i can, but i can't promise anything. so stay tuned! also, the song mentioned in the first chapter is called 'Don't Cry' by Guns N' Roses. it's a beautiful song, one that i recommend you guys listen to if you get a chance. 
> 
> art is welcomed and encouraged! i would love for my story to come to life through your art and talent.


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